


;)

by rabmyg



Category: Unlisted
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:54:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 26,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24256966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rabmyg/pseuds/rabmyg





	1. Chapter 1

Before Kim Taehyung had been born, before his parents had been born, before their parents had been born and so on, there had been a war.

Nobody knew a lot about the war; it was censored when spoken about across the remains of Korea. All he knew was that it involved nuclear warfare. Bombs had been dropped on all major global cities. Seoul, New York, London, Paris, Sydney, to name a few; not even Daegu had been saved. They called it World War III and Korea went into a state of crisis. They tried to fight back, deploying troops and sending out their own bombs, but humans were useless against anything involving nuclear weapons. Korea was obliterated along with the rest of the Earth.

The world came to an end.

Humanity had been downsized from 7 billion to a measly 900,000. In the Wasteland that Korea had become, small groups of people banded together to rebuild humanity and life as they knew it. From the rubble and ruins of cities, they scraped metal and wood and brick to build large communities and start their own form of governments. If humanity knew anything, it was that, without laws, society would be launched into chaos.

Taehyung knew a lot of history about his home. Built from the ashes and scraps of what had been Daegu, New Daegu was the biggest community in the entire Wasteland. It stretched almost four miles long and was protected by a large, eight-foot wall constructed of rotting apartments and office buildings, as well as scrap metal. The roads had been repatched and cleared of weeds, makeshift catwalks made sidewalks over roads between buildings, they even had their own source of purified water used from what had been an old man-made lake. The capitol building stood at the center of town, home to the overseer. New Daegu may have been nice, but its government was strict.

Taehyung lived in what was known as a closed community. You were born in New Daegu, and you died in New Daegu. Nobody was allowed in and nobody was allowed out. New Daegu wasn’t the only closed community in the area. It was common but didn’t rule society. They simply closed their doors to avoid raiders, disease, and radiation.

Taehyung learned that the Wasteland was a scary and dangerous place. People died out there. As long as he was behind the wall of New Daegu, he would be safe.

When he was born, he had a number permanently engraved into his arm. Taehyung was number 875.

Every day, Taehyung got three meals and was allowed to refill his water bottle only once. He went to school between the hours of 7 am to 2 pm, and curfew was at 9.

Each month all residents of New Daegu were required to get their hair cut. For men, their heads were shaved, for women, it had to be above the shoulders. They didn’t get many options for clothing either; everyone was required to wear the same one-piece skin-tight suits. The overseer claimed it made everyone equal. Taehyung knew being equal was considered a good thing, but there were some days he didn’t want to conform.

The Kim family was well known in the community. Taehyung’s father worked under the overseer as his right-hand man, and his mother was a school teacher. Taehyung was the oldest of the family, and he was supposed to be the role model.

Taehyung was the opposite of a role model. He got in trouble at school all the time for asking too many questions, for talking when he wasn’t supposed to, for being late.

And when Taehyung was 12 years old, his teacher, Miss Jeong, caught him stealing.

She smacked him upside the head with a ruler, pulling the comic book he had found in an old box in the supply cabinet out of his pocket, as well as another student’s water bottle. Security had been called immediately, and the other students watched in mixed curiosity and fear as Taehyung was dragged out of the school and down the street to the common area where he was tied to the public flogging post and shoved to his knees. One of the guards harshly tore off his shirt and he shivered in the cold as the loud snap of a whip echoed in his ears.

Taehyung screamed with each hit.

As he grew older, Taehyung never grew out of his rebellious phase. He would sneak out after curfew and visit the library, picking the lock to get into the banned books that talked about life before the war. He learned all kinds of things like that humanity used to have things called cars and televisions and toasters. Korea was governed by a democracy with three branches and was ruled by a president. Taehyung liked that title a lot better than an overseer.

Sometimes he stole the forbidden books from the library and shoved them under his mattress at home. Sometimes he would skip haircut day and let his hair grow out longer than code. Every time Taehyung got caught, he took his public whipping with pride, because Taehyung knew one day, he was getting out of here.

He heard rumors of open communities out in the Wasteland, communities where people could travel and come and go as they pleased. It amazed him that traveling could even be an option. Taehyung had been told the Wasteland was a dangerous place and he wouldn’t even last a day, but he didn’t believe the lies they told. Taehyung knew the Overseer was a liar. He knew the people in charge of New Daegu were liars.

Even his own father was a liar.

Taehyung began gathering stuff to leave here and there. He’d stick packaged food under his bed, steal extra bottles of water, extra boots, a long bowing knife.

On his sixteenth birthday, Taehyung was supposed to go to the capitol building to start his internship with the person who would introduce him to the job he would have for the rest of his life. Instead, he woke up early and gathered up all the supplies hidden under his bed and shoved them into his backpack. He ever took some of the pre-world books; curiosity always got the best of him. Then he snuck out through a weak part in the wall, a part that had been crumbled and replaced with sheet metal.

The Wasteland hit him like a severe illness. With the rising sun, Taehyung could feel the harsh wind, could see the dust blowing in his face, could see just how badly the war had been. Daegu really had been destroyed, buildings crumbled and the remains of... those were cars, Taehyung remembered, scattered around the cracked asphalt. He took a few steps forward, swallowing nervously as he shielded his face from the wind with his arm and began his trek through the rubble of the city. His feet stumbled over twisted metal, parts of old everyday objects, and...

Skeletal remains.

He swallowed again. This was what Taehyung wanted. He wanted freedom, not to be trapped in the same community for the rest of his life. He was just going to have to get used to all of, well, this.

“Three-fourths of humanity perished,” Taehyung said out loud as he walked, eyes observing the rusting metal and crumbling brick of the city. “The Wasteland is full of death and danger.”

He wasn’t seeing any of the danger yet, just an abandoned city.

Taehyung daydreamed about a city full of life as he continued on his way. A city where cars passed one another on the roads, where people walked on the sidewalks with their friends and family laughing, the sun on their skin. He imagined televisions and radios and phone calls between loved ones. Life before the war must have been incredible.

He wondered if anyone had been trapped in a closed community and denied the right to leave.

When the sun finally came up, it beat down hard on his head, causing sweat to run rivers down his face. Taehyung paused in his walking and pulled out one of his water bottles, downing almost all of it in one sitting. He hadn’t expected it to be so hot, and the dust and wind didn’t help either. Taehyung sighed, wiping the sweat off his forehead before shoving everything back in his bag and going on his way.

\---

Taehyung lasted a total of three days out on his own.

He kept moving throughout Daegu, pushing farther and farther out of the city. Taehyung had no idea of where he wanted to go, but he did know he wanted to be as far from New Daegu as possible. Maybe he would search for one of those “open communities” and stay there for a little while.

During the nighttime, Taehyung made his way into old buildings that were still standing and found a comfortable place to stay the night. During the day, he walked and walked and walked.

Taehyung hadn’t expected it to be so hot and dusty. He hadn’t packed enough water.

And on the third day, he ran out.

He didn’t panic though. If Taehyung just kept moving, kept scouring the buildings for goodies, kept on the lookout for a city, he’d find something. The thing was, Taehyung didn’t think about the raiders.

They came out of nowhere, hidden behind broken cars and buildings. Some wore masks, others wore sunglasses and bandanas, some nothing at all. They had large guns and knives and armor, and Taehyung was terrified.

“Give us the bag now,” one growled, his thick hair spiked into a mohawk. Taehyung stared in disbelief. He had never seen someone’s hair that...that, out there.

“I don’t have much,” Taehyung promised as he carefully slid his bag off his shoulders so they would know he was doing what they wanted. Truthfully, he still had a lot of food in the bag and of course the knife, but that wasn’t what he didn’t want to lose. He didn’t want to give away his books.

Another person behind one of the guns shoved it in his face and laughed mockingly. “What you doing out here, little city dweller? Surprised you even lasted a day.”

“Where you from, kid?” A third asked.

“New Daegu,” he started, trying not to show any signs of fear, “I--”

“New Daegu! Did you hear that boys? This little city dweller is a prep.” A fist grabbed Taehyung by the front of his suit and lifted him high enough that only the tips of his boots were on the ground. “However you managed to leave that shithole, you aren’t going to last very long out here, kid.”

Another fist hit him in the face, and then another, and another, until Taehyung was cowering on the ground as these grown men with guns continued to beat him up. Taehyung was a sobbing mixture of snot and tears by the time they left, all his stuff gone.

He wasn’t quite sure how long he laid there sobbing, but it was turning dark by the time someone tapped his shoulder. In surprise, Taehyung opened his eyes and looked right into the face of a dark-haired man with bright eyes. He had a scar that ran through his eyebrow and a smile full of kindness.

The man also had Taehyung’s books in his hands.

“Are these yours, kid?” His voice was deep and raspy. Taehyung sniffed and sat up, nodding his head.

“Yeah. There were these men, I think raiders--”

“You’re correct about that part. Rotten raiders, don’t have no respect for anybody in this Wasteland. They just take, take, take. They look like they put a toll on you.”

“They took my bag and food, but my books...” Taehyung trailed off, tapping his face before pulling back his fingers to see them stained with blood. “They beat me up and kept calling me city dweller.”

“You are though?”

Taehyung blinked. “What?”

“A city dweller. A closed community too, by the looks of your suit there. Not to mention you’re a little too trimmed and well kept to be surviving in the Wasteland. How the hell did you get out of a closed community kid?”

“I didn’t want to conform,” Taehyung replied quietly. The dark haired man sighed loudly and fumbled with the sleeves of his leather jacket.

“How long have you been out here?”

“Three days. Just turned sixteen.”

“Well kid, my name’s Jin. You alright if I take you back to my place and clean you up? I’ll get you some food and water too.”

Taehyung was skeptical. What if this guy was just like all the raiders? What if he was gonna lead him off a cliff or something?

Jin must have noticed Taehyung’s discomfort, for he gently laid a hand on his shoulder. “Look, kid, I’m not gonna hurt you, okay? I promise. You’re safe with me.”

He could feel his stomach rumble, and that was what got him. Taehyung let Jin help him up, handing him his books in the process. Taehyung pressed them to his chest as he walked next to Jin.

“My name is Taehyung by the way,” he mumbled, looking at the setting sun instead of over at Jin.

Jin nodded. “It’s nice to meet you, Taehyung.”

\---

It was about a mile and a half back to Jin’s place; Taehyung was surprised at how far he had walked already. Jin lived in what had been a suburb of Daegu, in an old ranger’s cabin in one of the parks. It was a one-roomed shack with the essentials: a bed, a fireplace, and a bag Jin said contained food. Jin turned on a lamp (he explained he found a generator to help him with electricity problems) and gently pushed Taehyung down onto his bed (well, it was more of a cot than a bed) and took the books from his arms, setting them gently down next to him.

“I’m just gonna clean your wounds up a little bit, okay? Don’t want the cuts to get infected or anything. Trust me, it’s not fun.”

Taehyung watched him open a cupboard above the fireplace and pull out a first-aid kit and a little container full of water. He cracked the kit open, pulling out some ointment and gauze, as well as a washcloth. Taehyung waited patiently as he wetted the cloth and moved back towards him.

He sat still while Jin scrubbed gently. “So kid, why did you leave?”

Taehyung didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t even sure if he wanted to say anything. “I uh, well, I didn’t want to be there my entire life, you know? I hated it there. I hated obeying and being the same as everyone. It just, well, I didn’t like it. I didn’t fit in. I wasn’t like everyone else.”

“I can understand that. So what were you planning on doing out here?”

“I...I don’t know. I didn’t really think it through I guess. I was just so focused on getting out.”

“Aren’t we all,” mumbled Jin as he set the cloth to the side and reached for the ointment. He lathered it on thick before wrapping the gauze around Taehyung’s head. “There, good as new. You’re welcome to stay the night here, kid. You can decide where to go in the morning. I got a map you can look at if you want. Let’s get you out of those clothes too; I got some old ones that might fit you.”

“Really?” Taehyung asked in surprise. Jin nodded and grinned as he moved to rifle through a bureau with wood peeling off. He pulled out a black shirt and a pair of old, ripped up jeans. Taehyung peeled off his stupid suit and slipped into the pants, feeling self-conscious at Jin staring at him. Taehyung knew how scared up his back was from years of public flogging.

Jin cleared his throat and looked away from Taehyung’s ghastly back. “Yeah, of course. You wanted to leave and you managed to get out. That’s incredible, kid, and takes a lot of guts. You wanna go somewhere, and I’ll help you out. As for tonight, you need to get some rest. Here.” This time Jin unzipped the duffel bag in the corner with care, pulling out a water bottle filled with yellowish looking water and a pack of dried meat. Taehyung stared in disgust at the water pushed his way.

Suddenly, Jin let out a large laugh. “You aren’t going to find that nice clear water out in the Wasteland my friend. Don’t worry, it tastes just fine. And it is water, when you get thirsty enough it’s the best thing in the world.”

With a wary look, Taehyung unscrewed the cap and took a sip, scowling at the taste. He was going to have to get used to that.

Jin chuckled again as he pushed the meat Taehyung’s way. “Eat. You need your strength back kid.”

“I...” Taehyung took a deep breath and fumbled with the food in his hands. “Just, thank you for everything.”

“I haven’t seen a kid out in the Wasteland in quite some time. Trust me, I’m happy to help.”

Taehyung smiled.

\---

The next morning, Taehyung woke up to sunlight streaming in through the windows. He blinked a couple times and groggily rubbed his eyes before sitting up, catching sight of Jin sitting in a chair across the room, one of Taehyung’s books in his hands. Music was playing as well.

“You’re listening to Gwangju Radio, your number one place for all the hits. That was Dion with The Wanderer, stay tuned for This Is It by Huey Lewis and The News.”

“Radio?” Taehyung said aloud, causing Jin to drop the book he was reading. He looked over at Taehyung with a grin.

“Yeah! Gwangju! It’s got the strongest radio signal in the entire Wasteland.”

“Radio still exists?” Taehyung was ready to jump with joy. He had read so much about radio, about how people would sit on their porches with them blasting music popular from the age. They were little small boxes with twisty dials and numbers and they ran on frequencies and batteries and sometimes electricity.

“Of course it still exists! They tell you different in the community?”

“I just... we didn’t have it. I thought it was gone, like cars and phones and stuff.”

Jin raised an eyebrow. “These books you have here, you weren’t supposed to have them, were you?”

Taehyung guiltily looked at the floor. “No. I just like reading about pre-world stuff. About how life used to be.”

“So you like history.” Jin bent down to retrieve the book he dropped and carefully set it down on top of the other ones. “Nothing wrong with that, I like it too. It’s interesting.”

“Yeah.”

“So, you wanna see the radio?”

Taehyung beamed. “Hell yeah, I do!” He jumped up from his spot on the bed and followed Jin’s finger to the small box sitting on the mantle of the fireplace. It seemed surreal, that here he was right now, touching something that had existed hundreds and hundreds of years ago. “Wow.”

“You’re a strange kid, you know that Taehyung?”

“Yeah. I just... I can’t believe it’s real.”

“If you like that, you’d probably like my Walkman too. Know what that is?”

Taehyung shook his head. “No clue.”

“It’s like a portable radio kinda, but it plays prerecorded cassette tapes. Runs on batteries. I found it once on one of my supply runs about a year and a half ago. Here.” He reached under his chair and pulled out a small, cardboard box, pulling out something Taehyung had no idea how to describe. “These are headphones,” explained Jin as he pointed to the two circles attached to the ends of a strip of plastic, a wire connecting to another small rectangle, “and this is where the tapes go. Here, put the headphones on.”

Taehyung took the headphones cautiously from Jin’s hands and put them on, making a face at how they felt on his ears. He watched Jin take one of the tapes from the box, a rectangle with two circular holes in it (Why were they called tapes?) and shove it into the place they were supposed to go. When the music started ringing in his ears, Taehyung pulled them off.

“Woah,” he said, blinking rapidly. He stuck a finger in each ear and wiggled them around before putting the headphones back on.

Jin watched him in amusement as he bobbed his head to the song, eyes wide as dish saucers. “How does it work?”

Jin burst into laughter, causing Taehyung to frown and pull them off. “What?”

“You’re yelling.”

“Oh.” Taehyung was laughing now too. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. I haven’t had any entertainment for a long time.” Jin suddenly lost his playful expression, instead it morphing into one of seriousness. He bit his lip and looked out the window of the cabin. “Taehyung, what if you stayed here?”

“W-what?” Taehyung was taken by surprise.

“You don’t know the first thing about the Wasteland, kid, and I could teach you. I could show you how to survive. You could be my companion, help me with supply runs. I could take you into town, teach you how to fire a gun, how to fight, how to defend yourself, teach you what to eat and what not to eat, etcetera. I’ve been living out here for more than a decade, so I think I'm qualified.”

“Are you serious?”

“One hundred percent.” Jin thrust his hand out in front of him with a small smile. “What do you say, kid?”

Taehyung stared at Jin’s calloused hand in front of him. It wasn’t a bad idea. Jin could show him how to live. He wouldn’t be wandering the Wasteland like an idiot.

“Could you teach me how to fight raiders?”

“Of course.”

“Then I’m in.” he gripped Jin’s hand tightly, a smile plastered to his face.

“Welcome aboard, Taehyung.”

\---

Taehyung knew that staying with Jin had been the best decision of his life.

Every day they did something new. Jin took Taehyung back out into the city. He showed Taehyung where to look to find medicine, food, and things that could be scrapped and turned into other necessities. He showed Taehyung where to find water, how to purify it and remove it of anything bad.

On one of the earlier days Jin handed Taehyung his pistol and told him to shoot. Taehyung stared at him like he was crazy.

“Shoot at what?” he asked.

“Anything.”

So Taehyung held the gun with two shaky hands and fired, the kickback sending him tumbling to the ground out of shock. His ears were ringing.

“We’re going to have to work on that,” he said with a smirk. “I’ve got a lot of guns and you’re going to have to learn how to use all of them.”

Another time they spent three days traveling to Gwangju so Taehyung could see what an actual open community looked like. He looked around in astonishment at all the bright lights, people, and buildings. It looked similar to New Daegu but a lot happier.

Jin bartered for some more ammo and clothes. They even stopped so Taehyung could have his first drink.

After the first year of being with Jin, they got ambushed by raiders. They had been on the edge of Daegu scavenging in an old apartment building when they were surrounded. Taehyung heard Jin make several shots, but he couldn’t find him.

Two raiders backed him into the corner of a room, large, wicked smiles on their faces. Taehyung tried to steady his gun and shoot, but his finger slipped on the trigger before he could do that and the bullet hit the wall opposite of him.

“Someone doesn’t know how to use a gun,” one of them cackled, firing a shot of his own. It hit Taehyung in the leg and a wave of pain rocketed throughout his body. His leg felt like it was on fire, blood soaking his pants. He fell to the ground, gun clattering to the floor. One of the raiders kicked it away.

“Who’s gonna help you now, leech?” the other sneered. Taehyung struggled not to cry.

“Just shoot him already dipshit, no one wants to hear your fuckin’ monologue.”

A bullet tore through his head then, blood spattering Taehyung. He fell to the ground in a heap, the other raider turning and shooting blindly. Another bullet ripped through him, his body landing on top of the other. Taehyung was crying now. His body hurt, and he was covered in so much blood that wasn’t his. He wanted to go back home.

“Taehyung? Taehyung! Where are you? Taehyung!” Jin was screaming hysterically. Taehyung managed a meek “in here” before coughing loudly. He locked eyes with Jin as he made his way around the corner, and then Jin was running. He dropped to his knees, mumbling a prayer under his breath when he noticed all the blood that had soaked through Taehyung’s leg. “Okay, we’re gonna get that fixed, okay? I promise. I’m so sorry Taehyung, I’m so sorry. I didn’t think this through.” Jin pulled Taehyung into a tight hug, allowing Taehyung to sob into his shoulder. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

“My leg,” Taehyung mumbled into the crook of Jin’s neck, drawing his attention to his wound. Jin pulled out his pocket knife and cut the fabric right above the wound so he could see it better. With a sigh, he rubbed at his forehead and reached into his bag to pull out the few medical supplies they had brought with him.

“The bullet is pretty lodged in there. I’m gonna have to take it out. It’s... well, there’s no way for me to sugarcoat this. It’s going to hurt like a bitch.”

Taehyung shoved one of his knuckles into his mouth and nodded for Jin to go ahead.

He wasn’t going to lie, that was the most pain he had ever been in.

After that, Taehyung got better at living out in the Wasteland. After three years, he could shoot a gun like a pro (still not as good as Jin could, but they were getting places) knew exactly where to find food, water, and medicine, could survive long nights out in the dust and wasn’t afraid to kill someone if he needed to. Sure, he still hated killing, but sometimes it was what you had to do.

Taehyung sat on the bed with the Walkman in his hand and the headphones over his ears. His eyes were closed as he listened to the music. Jin told him the name of this song was called Spirit in the Sky. He had said it was one of his favorites.

Jin was out at the moment on a supply run on his own. He had said he wanted alone time, and Taehyung didn’t blame him.

At 19 years old, Taehyung was happy with the way his life had turned out. He thought about his family still stuck in New Daegu living the same life each day. Taehyung hadn’t lived the same day since he had escaped. He was living a life of adventure, surviving, scavenging, living life. Taehyung wished sometimes his family could be with him.

But Jin was his family now. Taehyung loved Jin with all his heart and had no idea what he would do without him. Jin had changed his life for the better and made him more equipt for what life threw at him. He loved Jin’s quirky personality, his love for pre-world music, (“It’s mostly from the 1970s and 80s,” he had explained one night. “Sometimes the 50s and 60s, but mostly the 80s.” Jin loved the 80s.) how nice he was in general. Taehyung had learned from Jin to be optimistic about life’s challenges.

Taehyung was so incredibly thankful for Jin.

\---

They were out on a supply run when it happened again.

A raider attack.

They weren’t anywhere near Daegu this time, as the two had been traveling back home after visiting Gwangju again. There were so many raiders, far too many for two men to be up against.

Taehyung had his gun out, twisting and turning to make his shot. He ducked behind the counter of what had been a coffee shop as a wave of bullets ripped into the wall behind him. Taehyung knew Jin and he needed to get as far away as possible.

He popped up and fired three shots, killing one raider and injuring another. “Jin!” he called out, scanning the shop for his friend. Taehyung heard shots from the back room and made his way in there, killing two more raiders on his way in.

That was when it happened.

Taehyung couldn’t have stopped it.

The bullet moved in slow motion, ripping into Jin’s chest. Jin’s eyes went wide as his gun clattered to the floor below, his body slumping forward as he slid to the ground. Taehyung screamed loudly, firing all the bullets he had left in his gun, watching in pure fury as every last one hit the raider’s flesh. When the raider dropped dead, Taehyung was to Jin’s side in seconds, pulling the dying man into his lap. Blood soaked his hands and tears soaked his face.

“It’s okay Jin, it’s gonna be okay, we’re gonna get you patched up, it’s gonna be okay--”

“Taehyung,” Jin interrupted, his voice shallow and weak. “I’m not going to make it, you and I both know that.”

“No, you gotta have faith, remember what you told me? You said stay optimistic, you said--”

“Sweetheart. You have to be realistic.”

Taehyung tried to blink back tears, but they were flowing too hard for him to stop now. “You can’t leave me. I can’t live without you. I love you.”

“I love you too, Taehyung. You’ll be okay without me, I know you will. You were nothing but a preppy city dweller when I found you, and now you’re the best damn survivor out there in the Wasteland. You’re even better than me.”

“No, I’m not. I can’t, you can’t--”

“We both knew this day would come. It’s okay, Taehyung. I’ve been alive a long time, and now it’s time for me to go. You can survive out there, I know you can. You take care of my home, okay? Take care of my radio, and my Walkman, and all my tapes. There’s one I never showed you hidden under the floorboard. It’s my favorite one. It’s got a Simple Minds song on there, okay? I want you to listen to it. Know I love you so much, Taehyung. You were like a son to me.”

“Please don’t leave me.”

“You take care of yourself out there, kid.” And with one more quirky smile Taehyung loved so much, his eyelids were fluttering shut, and his body went limp. Taehyung gripped his body tightly, pulling it to his chest. He sobbed loudly, entire body shaking with grief. Jin couldn’t be gone. He couldn’t leave him alone. Taehyung would die on his own. He couldn’t live without Jin.

Taehyung let out a loud scream. And then another one, and another one.

These terrible, horrible people had killed his family for nothing more than amusement. He was going to kill every single one of them.

Every. Goddamn. One.

He was in so much pain, had so much anger fueling his body as he removed all the guns, armor and weapons from Jin’s corpse and placed it on himself. With his head held high, Taehyung clutched Jin’s body to his chest and walked through the streets until he reached the suburbs. He debated bringing the body home with him, but decided this was the first step in moving on.

So Taehyung laid Jin’s body carefully next to the remains of a car, and before he left, gave in by taking off the old leather jacket Jin always wore. He blinked back another round of tears before pivoting on his heel and going on his way.

After that, Taehyung didn’t cry anymore. He refused to.

When he got back to the cabin, it felt empty without Jin’s chipper tone. Taehyung dropped all his equipment to the floor and pulled up one of the rising floorboards, finding a cassette labeled “Marvelous Moving Tunes” in Jin’s messy scrawl. That got Taehyung to crack a small smile as he reached under his pillow for the Walkman and slide the tape in.

For one last time, Taehyung allowed himself to cry.

Because after that, Taehyung was not going to be the person he had been in the past. He was going to be an emotionless killer killing simply because he wanted revenge, stealing simply because it made him feel better.

After that, is where the story begins.


	2. Wasteland

**Six Years Later**

“Please don’t shoot me, I’m begging you p-please, I ain’t done nuttin’ wrong, please--”

“I’m not going to shoot you,” Taehyung said right before he pulled the trigger. The raider’s blood splattered his face as he let the body slump against his free hand before dropping to the ground. With a satisfied smirk he wiped the blood off his face with the back of his hand, looted the fucker’s body, and went on his way.

Fucking raiders. They were everywhere.

If there was anything Taehyung had learned over the past six years, it was that giving mercy was a sign of weakness, and Kim Taehyung was far from weak. Living on his own for so long had taught him that.

Not only could he shoot a gun like a motherfucker, but he had come across a sword from raiders about two years after Jin’s death and learned it was called a machete. It wasn’t as good as a gun, but he liked the feeling of slicing through flesh with that thing, animal and human (but mostly human.) His goal was to rid the Wasteland of the filth of the raiders.

What Taehyung was just now realizing was by doing just that, he had become a raider himself. Murdering and plundering didn’t make him appreciated in the Wasteland. It sure as hell made him well known though. He stopped traveling to communities to barter when he noticed a messy sketch of him posted on the wanted board. They didn’t know his name yet.

So Taehyung murdered a pack of raiders and left one behind.

“Tell them Vante sent ya,” he whispered in a husky voice before the scared kid was sent running back to the city of Gwangju. He laid back in his chair a few days later with a smirk of pride on his face as the radio mentioned the bounty out for Vante.

Over the years, Taehyung had managed to avoid the communities and security out to get him. If he did need supplies from the city, he would sneak in and steal, but Taehyung was able to get most things off of raiders or travelers. Vante became nothing more than an urban legend.

Sometimes Taehyung would sneak into town just to see how much the bounty had increased. Last time he had checked, it was up to 980 caps. Taehyung had sauntered back to camp with a smug grin on his face that night.

Anyways, reminiscing in old times was something Taehyung tended to avoid. Every time he looked in that little dusty mirror resting on the mantle of his cabin, he stared at himself with his long, shaggy brown hair cut messily short on the sides with his sword, the noticeable stubble he continued to grow out, silver nose ring and the white plugs shoved in his ears. Back before he was a wanted man, Taehyung had decided he wanted nothing to do with any community. He wanted that classic raider look, the tough guy look that would make anyone shake in their dusty boots. Taehyung had even thought about tattoos at one point, as they really were frowned upon in most communities, but decided against it after staring long and hard at the “875” engraved into his right arm. That was some reminiscing he never wanted to think about ever again.

So he shoved the headphones over his ears, clicked play on the tape, and continued his walk through the ruins of Daegu as Queen’s Another One Bites the Dust played in his head. Taehyung wasn’t afraid to admit sometimes he would lose himself in the music.

He also wasn’t afraid to admit he had listened to the tape so much he knew it backward and forwards. It was one of his last memories of Jin and Taehyung never wanted to forget Jin.

When Taehyung arrived home, he tossed the Walkman onto the bed and let his equipment slump to the floor below. Then he busied himself putting everything away. The medicine went under the floorboards next to the rest of the tapes and the ammunition he had gathered went in the small cardboard box on the mantel between the mirror and radio. Pausing to twist the dial on the radio, Taehyung began to hum as he hung up his guns and sword next to all the others and topped off the rest of his water.

“That was Jump by Van Halen, thank you for listening to Gwangju Radio, your number one place for all the hits! I’m your host, Jimin, and next, we’ll be going into our Frank Sinatra hour. But before that, we have some breaking news about the alleged raider Vante. Here with me now is Hueningkai, part of the Weightless Caravan here in Gwangju City, who claims to have seen the legend.”

“I’m not kidding Jimin, I saw him there, clear as day. He had this dark bandanna over his face and dark sunglasses, decked out in heavy guns and knives. He was super tall too, at least seven foot, and looked like he could beat the crap out of someone in one hit. The dude is bad news.”

“Well you heard it here folks; seems like Vante is out there lurking around. Stay safe out there in the Wasteland. Once again my name’s Jimin, and this is Frank Sinatra with Fly Me to the Moon.”

Taehyung snorted, pausing to glance at the radio before pulling off his machete, planning on polishing it a little bit. The new radio host of Gwangju definitely had an all over the place personality and tended to play more Frank Sinatra than anything else out there. He also talked more about Vante than any of the other radio stations in the area. Taehyung found it amusing when people described him as some mysterious, inhuman being. He doubted they actually saw him at all, just made stuff up to get on the radio.

Taehyung barely brushed 5’10” and he was definitely not as tall as everyone seemed to describe him as. Good, maybe they would leave him alone.

And really, that was how most of Taehyung’s days went. He went out into the city for supplies, traveled to open communities sometimes purely to hit caravans or packs of raiders and came home to clean up. It wasn’t a very exciting life, but it was the one he lived.

After heading outside to make sure his defense system was still set up and running correctly, Taehyung dusted off his hands and settled comfortably into the chair in the corner to read. Of course, he had read this book a thousand and one times, but it still didn’t stop him from reading it again.

That night Taehyung dreamed of flying on a plane to the ocean.

\---

The house hadn’t changed much from when Jin owned it.

Taehyung had decorated it a bit more, squeezing in some curtains he found and some racks for his extensive collection of weapons, as well as a bookshelf for his books. So far, it only contained the four he owned, but Taehyung looked everywhere for books. Most of them had been destroyed in the war and were hard to come across, but he never gave up hope.

He had also set up a defense system around the property, preventing any raiding or shooting from happening. Two machine turrets sat on either side of the front door and there was a trip wire four yards in front of the house. Nobody was getting in without Taehyung knowing.

Even though Taehyung lived alone, he wasn’t lonely. He liked being alone, liked the peace and quiet, liked his music.

“Jimin here. It’s a clear day out in the Wasteland today, temperatures rising around forty degrees. Stay warm out there travelers.”

Taehyung turned the radio off with a sigh. He didn’t want to stay inside today. Even though he went out yesterday, today was a new day. He could inch his way further near New Daegu without security seeing him and look for more supplies out there. Most importantly, Taehyung wanted to look for books.

So he suited up, changing into a long-sleeved black shirt and jeans, laced up his boots, slid on Jin’s old leather jacket, wrapped his hands and slung his holsters and bags. Two guns went into the holster around his waist, the container of ammunition in his bag, and the sword in the holster on his back. He wrapped a red bandanna around his mouth to help avoid dust, put on an old pair of fighter pilot’s goggles he had found in a plane wreckage, cracked his knuckles and prepared to leave. A water bottle went into the knapsack, a shotgun went in his hands and his Walkman shoved deep into his pocket. With the headphones over his ears, he reset the tape, kicked open the door, and went on his way.

Jimin hadn’t been lying; it was cold outside. The wind and dust didn’t help either, and he shook his hands to prevent them from freezing. Once he got moving, it would be a little warmer.

The Simple Minds song was playing, and all Taehyung could think of was Jin. He doubted Jin would be proud of what he had become, but Taehyung was fueled by pain and grief more than he was by love these days. He couldn’t help it.

Half the tape later Taehyung made it into the city, keeping his gun cocked just in case he needed to pull the trigger. He walked with a bounce in his step, his eyes moving everywhere at once. Taehyung was familiar with this part of the city, inside and out. It was when he got closer to New Daegu did he lose familiarity.

Taehyung was about 108 miles out from where his old home was, so without at least a couple days of walking he wasn’t going to reach it anytime soon. That didn’t mean he didn’t like moving closer to it.

When an unfamiliar large building came into view, Taehyung peeled off his headphones and laid them gently around his neck with a sigh. He heard a few gunshots.

“Fantastic,” he muttered under his breath before following the noise.

Taehyung had an itching to shoot someone anyway.

\---

Three hours and a sack full of supplies later, (he had found THREE books. THREE!) Taehyung was ready to make his trek back home. The sun was almost to its highest point, which meant he still had a few hours to kill. He wandered the streets, stepping over skeletal remains, splotches of dried blood, and pieces of debris, humming along to the music under his breath. That was when he suddenly froze.

A scream, clear as day, rang in his ears, even over the music.

With a hitched breath, Taehyung paused his music and removed his headphones, narrowing his eyes and straining his ears. Sure enough, there was another scream, and then a gunshot. Not good.

Now usually Taehyung wouldn’t get involved in business like this, but his finger was still itching to pull that gun, maybe swing that sword, so he started running.

He holstered his shotgun and pulled out one pistol instead, sighing happily as it cocked. Just a little further...

The scream sounded like a male, but really Taehyung couldn’t be sure. He learned that all things aren’t as they seem.

Taehyung crouched down behind an old truck and listened carefully. He peeked behind the bed of it, seeing two large men through the window of what had been a bicycle shop. Taehyung moved inwards, holding his breath as he made his way through the back of the store and hid behind a partially remaining wall.

“Just give us what we want and we’ll send you on your way, city scum. We know you got something.”

“I don’t, I promise, p-please, don’t k-kill me--”

“Shut the fuck up and do what he says!”

Taehyung blinked, rolling his eyes before moving the goggles up to his head. He let the bandanna hang around his neck with the headphones before peeking around the corner to better observe the scene.

There stood two raiders decked out in rusty armor that read GDPD on it, random pieces scattered throughout the both of them to make a complete set. They both had guns pointed at the smallest, lankiest man Taehyung had ever seen in the Wasteland. He wore ripped, grime-covered clothing, his dark eyes wide against the contrast of his skin. It was obvious he was not a resident of the Wasteland, not with his well-trimmed haircut and chin dusted with stubble showing it had only been a few days since he last shaved. There was a large cut above his eyebrow and his lower left leg was soaked with blood. What the hell was this guy doing out here?

Didn’t matter. Taehyung could kill all three of them and not care.

With a sigh he aimed his gun for the right raider and pulled the trigger, sending the bullet spiraling through the back of his head. Blood splattered all over the little guy, sending him into a state of shock. The other raider turned around with a “Hey, what the fuck do you think--” before Taehyung was sending another bullet through his jugular. With a smug grin, he dusted off his hands and pushed up from the ground, immediately going over to pick pockets and steal from the bags they had strung over their backs.

The lanky guy stared at him in fear, a mixture of blood that was both his and not his sprayed across his face along with flecks of dust. He threw his hands out in front of him, tears streaming down his face as Taehyung moved towards him. “Please don’t k-kill me, I won’t tell n-no one, I p-promise--”

“Oh, shut up,” Taehyung grunted, pulling out the magazine of one raider’s shotgun and emptying the bullets into his hand. The other guy watched him dump them in his bag and sling it back over his shoulders. “I’m not going to kill you.”

“Y-you... you killed both of them.”

“Yeah...” Taehyung raised an eyebrow before shaking the disgust off his face. Most people had morals, he realized that.

“And then you took their stuff! How could you--”

“Just because I said I wouldn’t kill you doesn’t mean I can’t change my mind,” Taehyung interrupted with a growl, tired of listening to this guy talk. His voice was high pitched and very strange sounding. He immediately clamped his mouth shut. “What’s your name. kid?”

“I mean, I’m p-probably around the same age as you--”

Taehyung rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

“It’s Jeongguk. I’m not from around here.”

Taehyung let out an abrupt, mocking laugh. “Obviously. Where’s your weapon?”

“I... I don’t have one.”

Taehyung glared at him like he was an idiot. “What kind of stupid are you?”

“Look, I’m part of The Bulletproof Boy Scouts, it’s a caravan in Daejeon, and we were making our way back from Gwangju after some bartering when we got jumped by raiders. I was the only one who managed to get away, they took all our stuff, everything. I swear.”

“So why did these fuckers want you? What do you have on you? Caps?”

“N-no, I have nothing on me, I swear. I was making my way back, but I got ambushed and, and-”

Taehyung suddenly pulled his gun on Jeongguk, slamming the barrel right against his temple. Jeongguk swallowed nervously, squeezing his eyes shut as a small whimper escaped his lips. “I’m not going to say it again. What do you have on you?”

Jeongguk began muttering something under his breath along the lines of “Father in heaven” and Taehyung slammed his head against the wall. “You tell me now or I blow your brains out.”

“Fine! Fine, okay yes, I got caps on me. They’re the only thing I have left, and it’s not even that much, just two hundred of them, and--”

“Give them to me.”

“W-what? But--”

“Give them to me now!” Taehyung growled again, digging the barrel farther into Jeongguk’s head. With a whiny plead Jeongguk nodded and reached a shaky hand into his pocket to pull out a small bag full of bottle caps. With a greedy smile, Taehyung ripped them from his grasp and shoved them into his pocket. “Thank you.”

Jeongguk called after him as Taehyung made his way out of the building. “W-wait! You can’t just leave me here!”

“And why not?”

“I, they shot me, I’m hurt, I’m going to die, and you’re the only person I’ve seen out here in the past three days that hasn’t been a raider, and, and--”

“Why do you assume I’m not a raider? You’re just as pathetic as the rest of the city dwellers.” Taehyung turned on his heel once more, pulling his headphones off his neck to put them over his ears. Jeongguk begged again.

“Please, you have to help me, I won’t be able to make it out here on my own, not without a gun, or money, and I can’t even move on my own, please--”

Taehyung thought of Jin just then. When Jin had found him, Taehyung had been in the same place as Jeongguk. If Jin had never done what he did, Taehyung would have died. Besides, Jin would be even more disappointed if Taehyung didn’t help him.

So he swallowed his pride, clenched his jaw and turned back to the well-trimmed city dweller.

“Fine,” he muttered, moving back over the rubble to drop to his knees. He inspected the blood-soaked pant leg with a sigh and slid his knapsack over his shoulder. A sigh of relief fell over Jeongguk, and he began thanking Taehyung far too many times. One glare and Jeongguk shut up.

Taehyung pulled a knife out of his bag along with the few medical supplies he had brought along and cut into the pants right about the wound. The bullet was deep and lodged in Jeongguk’s skin pretty nicely. With a muttered “fuck,” Taehyung leaned back on his haunches and stared over at the heavily panting Jeongguk.

“It’s in there pretty good, kid. It’s gonna hurt like a bitch to take it out.”

“Go ahead.” He stared at Taehyung with a dead expression, not even bothering to bite down on a knuckle or anything. If he screamed Taehyung was going to punch him.

“You don’t wanna, bite down or anything?”

“I’m good. Go ahead.”

“I don’t have any painkillers.”

“Go. Ahead.” The kid’s entire expression had changed in the blink of a second, and Taehyung shrugged his shoulders.

“Alright.” he looked over at Jeongguk one last time before wiping the knife clean on his pants and digging it into the wound. He could tell Jeongguk was in a lot of pain; his forehead was covered in sweat and his Adam’s apple bobbed severely, yet no noise escaped his mouth. What kind of pain tolerance did this kid have?

After Taehyung carved out the fragments, he bit off a piece of old fishing wire with his teeth and threaded it through a needle from the first aid kit. Jeongguk glanced at Taehyung, fear flashing briefly before he was nodding his head again.

Taehyung had to give it to the guy, he was tough.

45 minutes later Taehyung was finished and leaned back to admire his work. Jeongguk was pale and looked ready to pass out. No way could he leave him here.

Even if Taehyung was an emotionless bastard, he still had a little bit of compassion.

With another sigh, Taehyung reached into his bag to retrieve his water bottle and poured a little bit of it onto the wound. The rest he handed to Jeongguk, who downed it without even questioning its yellow discolor. Good for him.

When he finished with the water, Taehyung pushed him a small piece of bread to eat as well. They sat in silence as Jeongguk shakily ate.

“Thanks,” he said quietly once he finished. Taehyung nodded his head.

“Uh, well, the sun’ll be down in a few hours, and you can’t be wandering the streets in your condition, so I guess... you could, uhm, come back with me. If you wanted to.” Jeongguk continued to stare at him so Taehyung added, “I’ll give you your money back.”

“Uhm, yeah. Yeah. Thank you, that would be really nice of you.” He winced as he shifted.

“Alright, quit it with the mushy stuff. And don’t kill yourself already.” Taehyung quickly gathered up the rest of his stuff and strung his bag back over his shoulders before helping Jeongguk slowly stand up. He winced again once he had settled.

At this pace, it would be midnight by the time they got home.

“You good?” Taehyung asked. Jeongguk nodded.

“Yeah, I’m good. Let’s go.” He started inching his way out the door with a limp, his injured leg dragging through all the debris. Taehyung ran a hand through his hair and settled his protection before following Jeongguk. He walked next to him cautiously, looking over at him every few seconds. Every time he asked if Jeongguk needed to lean on him, the kid would shake his head and bite his lip. Taehyung felt terrible. He knew how much it sucked getting shot.

They walked in silence for the longest time, Taehyung resisting his every urge to put his headphones over his ears. The last time he had interacted with someone like this, had been Jin.

And that had been six years ago.

When they reached the familiarity of the suburbs, the sun was completely gone. Jeongguk stopped moving, his hands on his knees as he panted like a dog. Taehyung swallowed hard.

“You need to take a break?” Just like every other time, Jeongguk shook his head and continued limping. Taehyung had to give him that, the guy was stubborn. “We’re almost there.”

“Awesome.”

\---

When they reached the park, Taehyung held a hand out in front of Jeongguk to stop him from moving. “There’s mines and stuff scattered throughout the park. I put them there for protection,” he explained before swinging Jeongguk into his arms, bridal style. Jeongguk yelped in surprise but didn’t fight him off. Taehyung felt naked without access to his weapons, but he had to remind himself this was more important.

Taehyung didn’t put Jeongguk down until they were inside the cabin. He laid him down on the bed and dropped all his equipment to the ground, per usual, before switching on the lamp.

“Sorry. Just thought that was the easiest way to get through.”

“Yeah. No, I understand.”

“Right.” Taehyung rolled his eyes and busied himself by putting his stuff away. He could feel Jeongguk’s eyes burning a hole into his back. “Why do you keep staring at me?”

“I uhm...” Jeongguk stuttered, not finding the right words to grasp onto. “I don’t know. You’re just... interesting. I don’t even know your name.”

“It’s Taehyung,” he grunted, shelving the new books he obtained. He didn’t want to reveal where all his stuff was hidden.

“Taehyung. Hmm. That’s nice.”

“Whatever. You want the radio or not?” He placed his hands on his lips, glaring at Jeongguk before deciding Jeongguk’s opinion didn’t matter and turned it on. Frank Sinatra was playing again. “Damn that radio host.” 

“Gwangju Radio?” Jeongguk questioned excitedly. “Yeah, Chim plays Sinatra quite a bit, doesn’t he? He’s a nice guy though. Buys a lot of old junk from us.”

Taehyung replied with another grunt as he hung his weapons back on the rack and slid the goggles off his head. Jeongguk went back to staring at him.

He tossed Jin’s jacket over the back of the chair and stripped out of his long-sleeved shirt, shivering slightly before slipping into a clean, short sleeved one from the bureau. Then he went to work starting a fire.

“875,” Jeongguk said aloud after Taehyung had gotten a flame to light in the fireplace. Taehyung turned around. He had forgotten Jeongguk was watching him.

Taehyung clenched and unclenched his fists by his side. Why had he brought this guy home again?

Oh right. Kindness.

Well, this was enough kindness for the next ten years.

“You’re from a closed community,” Jeongguk exclaimed in disbelief. “How did you get out?”

“None of your fucking business,” he growled in response before pulling Jeongguk’s cap stash out of his pocket and tossing them his way. “Tomorrow morning, you’re out of here. I don’t care if you blow up trying to get out.”

He looked ready to say something, but his mouth snapped shut. Taehyung quietly set a glass of water and a can of beans next to the bed before cowering to the chair, scooting closer to the fire before cracking open a book. This is why Taehyung didn’t do nice things. People tended to overstay their welcome.

“Hey there travelers, we’ve got more news about Vante. His bounty is now up to 2,000 caps, so if you’re looking for work, ya might wanna try your luck and head out into the Wasteland! I’m your host Jimin, and this is Gwangju City Radio. Next, we’ve got Fooled Around and Fell in Love by Elvin Bishop.”

Taehyung slammed his book shut as the music started and shoved his hands towards the fire. Jeongguk looked over at him before quickly looking away.

“The radio makes a big deal out of that guy you know. It’s obvious he’s not even real.”

That caught Taehyung’s attention. He looked over at Jeongguk twisting his hands together. “Yeah? You think so?”

“Yeah. He’s just a fairy tale.” Jeongguk shrugged, not bothering to look up. Taehyung rubbed his neck and sighed.

“Look, kid. I’m sorry for being such a dick. I’m just, well, it’s been quite some time since I’ve interacted with other people.”

“How long have you lived alone?” his voice was demanding.

“Six years,” muttered Taehyung as he pushed himself up out of the chair and set his Walkman carefully on the shelf. Really, Taehyung just needed to distract himself from everything.

“Oh.”

“Yeah. Anyways, you should probably get some rest. That’s gonna be the best thing for your leg at least. You can have my bed.”

“No, Taehyung, I can’t--"

“I got a sleeping bag, it’s fine. Besides, it’s only one night.” He turned off the lamp before Jeongguk could say anything else and opened the bottom drawer of the bureau to retrieve the said sleeping bag. The only sounds were those from the radio and the crackling of the fire and Taehyung laid down with his fingers strung over his chest.

“Goodnight Taehyung,” Jeongguk murmured as he turned to face the other way.

“Goodnight, kid."

\---

That night Taehyung had a dream that wasn’t exactly appropriate. He woke up soaked in sweat, his face bright red.

With a sigh he rifled fingers through his hair, pausing to glance over at Jeongguk before staring at the dying embers. For Christ’s sake, he had known the guy one day!

Taehyung hated dreaming, he decided.

He got dressed quickly and decided to do some hunting before Jeongguk woke up.

\---

When Jeongguk did wake up, it was to the smell of cooked meat, Taehyung carefully crouched over the fire. He turned around when Jeongguk let out a loud, audible yawn.

“Good morning,” Jeongguk quipped cheerfully. Taehyung grunted in response.

Two minutes later he brought Jeongguk a plate and thrust it into his hands before carefully sitting on the edge of the bed. “How’s your leg?”

“Still hurts like a bitch. Not feeling too good actually.” He still held a smile, but it faltered. Taehyung sighed and inspected the wound. The skin surrounding it was red and puffy; not a very good sign.

He pressed his hand to Jeongguk’s forehead. “You’ve got a fever. It’s probably infected.”

“Shit.”

“Here, let me get some ointment and wrap it up. Don’t want it getting worse than it already is.” Taehyung pawed at his face before moving to the floorboard he kept his medicine under and retrieved the needed essentials. When he noticed Jeongguk staring at him once more, he pointed to the plate in his lap. “You eat.”

Jeongguk obeyed, biting into breakfast with interest. Taehyung wasn’t about to tell him it was a squirrel.

He himself went to work cleaning Jeongguk’s wound as best as could, lathering the ointment nice and thick before wrapping a heavy amount of gauze around it. This was when it occurred to Taehyung that Jeongguk wasn’t leaving tonight. Or tomorrow. Or the day after that.

Fantastic.

“So, you’re not leaving anytime soon,” Taehyung said, watching Jeongguk chew politely. Man, he forgot what city dwellers were like, he hadn’t been one in so long.

When Jeongguk swallowed, he responded, “Yeah. Kind of figured.”

“So you can stay until you get better.” Damn, was that hard for him to say.

“Really?” He actually seemed genuinely surprised, dark eyes growing all big to the point where it was actually cu--

Oh no. Nope, no, no. Taehyung did not just think about that. He wasn’t going to.

“Yeah.” Taehyung went back to keeping his answers short. He was starting to get attached to this little pacifist city dweller and that was something he didn’t want to happen. “Don’t think I like you, cause I don’t.”

“That much is obvious.” Jeongguk chuckled a little before setting his plate on the bedside table and laying back down. “Thank you though, for letting me stay here. I can tell how much you don’t want me to be here.”

Taehyung snorted as he stood up, going to turn off the radio. The host annoyed him too much sometimes.

He needed to get out of the house. It was still going to be a normal day, whether he had company or not.

“I’m going out,” Taehyung decided, not bothering to look at Jeongguk. He began shoving supplies into his bag, slinging his holster around his waist in the process. Taehyung knew perfectly well the son of a bitch was staring at him though. He didn’t seem to realize that was rude.

The last thing he reached for was his Walkman, stringing the headphones around his neck before giving Jeongguk a quick glance. He looked up at Taehyung with a slight head tilt, eyes full of curiosity.

“What is that?” He asked, and what Taehyung should have done was turn and walk out the door.

Instead, he sat down on the bed once more and told Jeongguk to put the headphones on.

“It’s called a Walkman,” he explained, fishing the actual Walkman part out of his pocket. “It was really popular before the war. They would put these little cassette tapes in them and listen to music. Here, this is the tape.” Jeongguk watched in wonder as Taehyung pulled the tape out of the deck and shook it gently. “It goes in here. What you have on are called headphones. Don’t ask why they’re called that. I have no clue.”

After he put the tape back in, he pressed play, watching as Jeongguk’s eyes lit up in surprise. He quickly pulled the headphones off and glanced around the room.

“Can only I hear that?” his voice was full of astonishment and Taehyung was thinking horrible thoughts again.

No matter what his stupid brain was thinking, Jeongguk in amazement was not cute. Taehyung didn’t even know what that word meant.

“Yeah. That’s why it’s cool. Here, put them back on.” Taehyung moved to gently set the headphones back over his ears, his hands accidentally bumping against Jeongguk’s. He pulled away sharply, praying Jeongguk didn’t notice.

They sat for a few seconds, Taehyung watching Jeongguk move his head happily, eyes still wide in surprise.

“I really like this song!” he exclaimed, practically shouting at Taehyung.

For the first time in six years, Taehyung actually laughed.

He reached for the Walkman and pressed pause, staring smugly at Jeongguk as he blinked a couple of times.

“What?”

“You’re shouting.”

“Oh.” Jeongguk chuckled, his face burning red. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Let me see what you were listening to.” This time Taehyung set them on his head, pushing them back so they wouldn’t interfere with the goggles also on his head and pressed play.

_ I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say _

_ I know they don't sound the way I planned them to be _

_ But if you wait around a while, I'll make you fall for me _

_ I promise you I will _

Ha fucking ha. The world could be so cruel and utterly ironic at times.

Taehyung reset the tape.

“Anyways, that’s a Walkman. I’ll see you in a few.” Taehyung turned to leave when Jeongguk reached out for his arm.

“What’s the song called?” That same warm smile that filled Taehyung’s stomach with butterflies was back. Goddammit, Taehyung was a heartless killer. Tiny men with big mocha eyes and soft smiles did not give him butterflies.

“The Promise. When in Rome. Is that all?”

“Uh, yeah. Stay safe out there, okay?”

“Yeah.” He settled the goggles over his eyes, tied the bandanna over his mouth, pressed play on his tape and shot out the door with a gun already cocked in his hand.

No more Jeongguk for today.

Or ever, really.


	3. Jeongguk

Somehow, Taehyung managed to convince himself that Jeongguk wasn’t real when he was back out in the Daegu ruins. He refused to think of Jeongguk’s big eyes so full of innocence and purity and his warm smile and his nice hands (seriously, who had hands that nice?)

Not Jeongguk. Jeongguk didn’t even exist.

Too bad that daydream was shattered when he came back into the house to see Jeongguk sitting on the bed, his good leg thrown over the side. He curled inwards on himself when Taehyung came in, almost like a dog who had just got caught doing something bad.

“Oh. Hey.”

“Hey,” Taehyung responded, setting his Walkman at the end of the bed before going to hang his gear up. “Tomorrow I’m gonna do some laundry. I’ll wash your clothes and you can borrow some of mine.”

“Thanks,” mumbled Jeongguk, his fingers twisting in his lap. Taehyung noticed he kept glancing over at the Walkman next to him.

With a sigh, he waved his hand. “Go ahead.”

“Huh?”

“I know you wanna mess around with it. Go ahead. Just don’t break it or anything. Batteries are a little hard to come by these days.” Jeongguk nodded in response, taking the Walkman in his hands with care. He flipped it over, observing it like it was the most interesting thing in the entire world.

“How do you know what the songs are called if they’re pre-war?”

“Uhm,” Taehyung rubbed his neck, “My friend found them. The tapes were in these cases with the songs scrawled on the back. He was really into the oldies.”

“Ah.” Jeongguk’s eyes fell back to the Walkman. “Is that friend of yours still around?”

“No.” Taehyung swallowed hard. He wasn’t going to cry. That was a sign of weakness. “He’s been gone for a long time. This was his house, actually.”

“I’m so sorry, Taehyung,” his voice was so sincere, so full of sympathy.

Jeongguk reminded him of Jin.

“I just, I gotta step out for a little while,” Taehyung mumbled before taking back out the front door. Taehyung wasn’t going to cry.

Kim Taehyung did not cry.

Jin always had been a soft spot with him though, and Jeongguk was the first person he had ever talked to about Jin. In fact, Jeongguk was the first person Taehyung had interacted with that hadn’t been at gunpoint. (Even though part of it was briefly.)

Taehyung wasn’t quite sure what Jeongguk did to him. Jeongguk was just your average city dweller, just a normal, average human being. He was a small kid with little meat on his bones who wouldn’t last a day in the Wasteland. In fact, if it hadn’t been for Taehyung, Jeongguk would have surely died.

“Oh, fuck,” he muttered, raising a palm to his forehead. It made sense now.

Jeongguk was the exact same way Taehyung had been nine years ago.

Okay, so maybe this was Taehyung’s conscience trying to make up for everything Jin had done. Taehyung was always thinking about what Jin would do. And he felt in debt to Jin, for all he did for him. He knew he would always feel in debt.

So maybe taking Jeongguk in was him subconsciously trying to repay his debt to Jin. He knew Jin would have taken the kid in.

Problem was, that wasn’t the only thing that intrigued Taehyung. It was how nice Jeongguk was, how nice he could be to someone so rude to him, how he could trust someone out in the Wasteland when it was full of murderers and thieves. The kid didn’t believe in violence, didn’t believe in stealing, didn’t believe in all the basic things people had to do out here to survive.

And he was absolutely gorgeous, but Taehyung was going to ignore that.

After Jeongguk got better, he was leaving, and Taehyung would be alone again, just how he liked it.

Just how he wanted to be.

\---

When he came back into the house, Jeongguk was still on the bed with the headphones over his ears and eyes closed shut. He looked peaceful.

Taehyung felt bad bothering him, so he left once more, planning on checking the defense system. Everything seemed to be fine, so he went back inside. Jeongguk hadn’t even moved.

He tapped Jeongguk on the shoulder softly, causing him to jump a little. He blinked a few times, staring at Taehyung before clicking pause and taking the headset off.

“You feeling better?”

Taehyung cleared his throat. “Yeah. M’fine. Let me look at your leg.” Jeongguk scooted over and swung his leg back up so Taehyung could examine the wound. He peeled back the gauze sticky with ointment and narrowed his eyes. “Looks like it’s getting better. Slowly but surely. The medicine must have helped.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah.” Taehyung took his Walkman in his hands and set it on the bookshelf, pausing to gently pad his fingers across the new books he had gotten the day before. One of them had a picture of a fireman on the front surrounded by flames. He was lost in a daze, running his fingers across the burned cover until Jeongguk cleared his throat.

“Are you okay, Taehyung?”

“I’m fine,” he grumbled, stepping away from the bookshelf to turn on the radio so it was nothing but a low hum in the background. Taehyung then dropped to the floor, pulling more wood from his pile that was starting to get low. Guess he was getting more wood tomorrow too.

Taehyung poked at the flame absentmindedly, listening to the music. He was surprised it wasn’t Sinatra playing at the moment. If Taehyung ever met that Jimin guy, he’d punch him in the face.

“That was Want You Back by The Jackson 5, and you’re listening to Gwangju Radio. My name’s Jimin ‘Cutie’ Park, here with the news. It’s cloudy skies tonight with a slight chance of snow, temperatures ranging from a high of thirty degrees to a low of eight. The city is lit up tonight for the game, so if you’re nearby, come on in! Gwangju is always open to the Wastelanders. I’ve also got reports on another sighting of the mysterious Vante, last seen heading west towards Daejeon. If you got any sightings, send ‘em my way! And it’s request hour! If you’re a Gwangju resident, come on down to my station. You know where to find me. Next request comes from a ‘Ha Sungwoom,’ requesting the popular hit ‘Jimin, we need to talk,’ but I can’t seem to find that song so I’m playing Rock of Ages by Def Leppard instead.”

“Jimin is quite the character, isn’t he?” Jeongguk said dreamily, almost if to himself. Taehyung shrugged, rotating his position so he could look over at Jeongguk and pull his knees up to his chest.

“Kind of annoying in my opinion. Plays too much Sinatra. In fact, I’m starting to friggin’ hate Frank Sinatra.”

“What do you like to listen to?”

Ohh no. Taehyung knew exactly what Jeongguk was trying to do. He was trying to make small talk and Taehyung wasn’t going to give in to his mind tricks.

“Eighties.” he grumbled, turning back to poke at the fire.

“You like to read, don’t you Taehyung? Do you like history and all that stuff? Pre-world history I mean. Everyone knows about the shithole we live in now.”

“Yeah. So?” He felt like Jeongguk was patronizing him, even though he wasn’t. Was it too early to go to bed? Not that he would even get his own bed back until God knows when.

“There's nothing wrong. It’s just different, I guess. But you’re different.” he looked away from Taehyung, grasping the thin blanket strewn across the bed with his fingers. Taehyung scoffed.

“Right. Looks like it’s time for us to go to bed.” With an eye roll, he latched onto the mantle to pull himself up and clicked off the radio before walking two paces to turn off the lamp. The cabin was plunged into eerie darkness, the fire casting large shadows across the walls. Taehyung tried not to think about how nice Jeongguk looked with the warmth of the fire on his face.

He settled himself down on the sleeping bag, turning his back towards Jeongguk so he wouldn't have to look at him. Taehyung could hear Jeongguk making himself comfortable behind him.

“Goodnight, Taehyung,” Jeongguk whispered.

Taehyung didn’t answer.

\---

Fortunately for Taehyung, he didn’t experience any new, er, erotic dreams, and woke up nice and early to get a jump start on the day. The first thing he wanted to do was chop firewood, and then later, when Jeongguk woke up, he would go do laundry. Taehyung was also in desperate need of some bathing. He figured Jeongguk might be too.

And then Taehyung found himself thinking about Jeongguk naked.

“Fuck,” he muttered, shaking his head. It had been two days. Two.

“You’ve got a crush,” Taehyung pictured Jin saying in a singsong voice as he wiggled his eyebrows. He scowled under his breath.

He didn’t have any crush. Crushes were for 14-year-old boys.

So Taehyung manned up and left the house, shivering a little at his poor attempt at keeping himself warm. He had been so focused on not being in the same room as Jeongguk that he left his jacket inside.

Oh well, too late now. He wasn’t risking waking Jeongguk up. Taehyung simply didn’t want to listen to him ask questions.

He hadn’t forgotten his Walkman though, and with music blasting through his ears Taehyung grabbed the ax leaning against the side of his cabin and disappeared into the woods to chop. It would have been a good idea to chop more wood before it got cold, but his past self hadn't done that. With a shake of his head, he brought his arms back and swung as hard as he could at the tree in front of him. It wasn’t too difficult to get the trees to come down; all of them were dead.

Hungry Like the Wolf came on, and Taehyung stopped swinging the ax. He leaned against a different tree to catch his breath, trying to avoid focusing on the lyrics. Why couldn’t he get the stupid city dweller off his mind?

_ I howl and I whine, I’m after you. _

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” he cursed loudly at how fucking stupid his body was, knowing perfectly well what was going on in his pants. Fuck that song.

Taehyung finished chopping wood without music.

\---

He didn’t give his body the satisfaction by sticking his hand down his pants like he wanted to and instead let it go away by itself as he continued to bring stacks of wood to the front of the house. Taehyung gathered as much wood as he could in one armful and stepped inside, leaving the rest outside for later. He noticed Jeongguk was awake, doing nothing more than staring at the ceiling. He didn’t even move or look over as Taehyung dumped his armful of wood into the corner.

“Mornin’,” he huffed, dusting flakes of bark off his hands “you hungry?”

“A little.”

Taehyung turned on the radio, muttering a silent “thank god” that Jimin’s obnoxious voice wasn’t on at the moment before sitting down at the end of the bed. He pulled Jeongguk’s leg into his lap, causing Jeongguk to jump in surprise.

“Sorry.”

“Your hands are freezing,” he whined, squeezing his eyes closed briefly before opening them again.

Taehyung rubbed his hands together to generate some heat before gently pulling down on the gauze again. It looked better than yesterday, but he figured he should replace the bandages to avoid making it even worse. “I’m gonna put new bandages and medicine on it. It looks a lot better than it did yesterday, I’ll give you that. You might even be able to get up and walk by the end of the week.”

Jeongguk snorted. “Please. I’ll get up and walk today. I hate being bedridden. You chopped wood without me, so what was next? Laundry?”

Surprised at Jeongguk’s statement, Taehyung stared with his mouth agape before swallowing. “Uh, yeah. It’s pretty chilly outside, so the stream might be frozen. We might have to put a hole in it or something. I’m also gonna try and clean myself off. I have some soap I got off a raider one time. It’s been far too long since I last bathed. Yeah, I know it’s gross.”

“Not like you have access to a shower.” Jeongguk looked out the window, where little flurries of snow were starting to fall to the ground. “It’s gonna be cold.”

“Yeah. Not anything I’m not used to. I’ll just keep the fire going.” he stood up, maneuvering his way over to the first aid stored under the floorboards. “Pretty sure I got a towel for you to use somewhere in here. I’m not one for drying off.”

“You don’t dry off after you bathe? But then your clothes get all wet!” Jeongguk seemed actually bothered by this information. It brought some amusement to Taehyung’s brick wall of a face.

“Then I’ve got a fire to dry me off. Problem solved.” He plopped back down next to Jeongguk, once again pulling his injured leg towards him. Jeongguk watched closely with his teeth pulled over his bottom lip as Taehyung undid the gauze, cleaning off all the old ointment and oozing liquids from it before applying a fresh coat and wrapping the new gauze tightly around it. He threw the old one into the fire before offering an arm to help Jeongguk stand up.

“Thanks.”

“You go out and bathe first, so I can go ahead and wash your clothes. I’ll show you where the stream is. Let me just, uh, gather stuff.” Taehyung stepped away from Jeongguk before heading back over to the cabinet above the fireplace, pulling out a small box full of miscellaneous items. With a small cheer, he pulled out the soap and then turned towards the bureau to rummage for the towel he had used probably once. He also pulled out some clean clothes for Jeongguk.

Most of Taehyung’s clothes were all of Jin’s, besides the ones he had stolen off of raiders. Taehyung even still had the suit from New Daegu, hidden away at the bottom of the dresser. He wasn’t sure why he still had it.

“Here,” Taehyung grunted after shoving all of it into his bag he usually took on runs. Jeongguk nodded.

“I uh, thanks.”

“Yeah. You gonna be able to lace up your boots or no?”

“I can do it,” Jeongguk snipped, his brow furrowing into annoyance as he reached for his shoes by the threshold. Taehyung watched with a smirk at Jeongguk struggling to bend down for his shoes. The kid had too much pride.

“You need help, Jeongguk?”

“I’m fine,” he growled, sucking in a breath once he finally managed to grab a hold of his shoes. Then, with a bitten lip, he slipped his feet into them, pausing to take a few breaths.

“You suuure you don’t need any help? Look, I’m pretty stubborn too, but you took a fuckin’ bullet to the leg.”

“Let me jus’, hold on.” Jeongguk’s eyes slammed shut, his palms clammy as he leaned against the door. Taehyung actually had sympathy for the scene going on in front of him.

He wasn’t sure what compelled him to do this, but suddenly Taehyung was across the room, his hand gently on Jeongguk’s shoulder before he crouched down and helped him get his socked feet into his shoes. Jeongguk was trying to be strong, but he was sweating immensely, and sucking in a little too much air. Taehyung laced up his boots, double knotting the ties before standing back up. He retrieved his jacket and his bag before once again offering his arm to Jeongguk. Jeongguk gave him a look that could kill before latching onto his arm with one more shaky breath. Taehyung pushed open the door, and the two were on their way in the frigid air.

\---

Taehyung wished he could ignore how much pain Jeongguk was trying to hide, but deep down his conscience was barking up a storm. He was happy Jeongguk still had a jacket though. At least he wasn’t twice as miserable.

When they reached the stream, Taehyung was relieved it wasn’t completely frozen over. He looked at Jeongguk with a furrowed brow.

“You gonna be okay on your own?”

Jeongguk shivered. “I uhm, no actually.”

“Someone finally killed their pride, huh?” Taehyung teased, sliding the bag off his shoulders. He pulled off his jacket and shirt before nodding towards Jeongguk. “Alright, let’s get this over with.”

“Huh?” Jeongguk stared at him like he was on fire.

“I’m gonna help you get clean, thought we established that. Now c’mere, so I can help you take your shirt off.”

“I can do that on my own,” Jeongguk grumbled in an offended tone. He slid his jacket off his shoulders and flung it lazily on top of Taehyung’s pile before peeling his shirt off as well. Taehyung blinked, his mouth cracking open slightly.

For someone so seemingly tiny, Jeongguk sure had a nice body.

And for someone who strictly worked in a caravan, he sure had a lot of scars.

On his left arm were also tattoos. A flower with “Please love me” written behind it, some black lines, and several other things Taehyung couldn’t quite make out. How had he gotten those? When had he gotten those? He thought tattoos were bad and a sign someone was a troublemaker. Why did someone like Jeongguk have tattoos?

He didn’t have much time to think about it now, so Taehyung forced himself to turn his head away. “Okay. You should probably, uh, take your pants off too. I mean, they are pretty much already destroyed with me cutting into them and stuff. Take off your shoes as well.”

Jeongguk shivered, nodding his head in agreement. “You can cut the pants off of me. Don’t want to risk hurting myself any worse.”

“Er, right.” he pulled his knife out of his pocket and flicked it open, dragging it down the seam of the fabric. He balled them all up and tossed them deep into the woods. After that, he helped him slip out of his shoes.

That left Jeongguk in just his underwear, his wound dark against his shivering skin. Taehyung pointed to the water. “So uhm, I guess we’re bathing together.”

Fuck this guy, fuck this guy, fuck. this. guy.

“You can take your jeans off. No point in getting them soaking wet.”

“Okay.” Taehyung hated how he felt right now. He felt awkward and nerdy, like he did as a 12-year-old in the changing room during gym. Jeongguk was just a guy.

A guy he had known for two days and was about to help bathe.

But, he argued with himself, You’re helping him recover. You’re being nice.

Well, fuck. Taehyung hated being nice.

He stripped out of his jeans and shoes and added them to the pile, grabbing Jeongguk by the arm to lead him to the water. Jeongguk flinched at the coldness, and Taehyung could feel his muscles constricting underneath his touch as he helped settle Jeongguk down into the water. Taehyung was used to bathing in freezing water, but Jeongguk lived in a community that had homes with warm, running water. He doubted the guy had ever done anything like this in his life.

With a loud grunt, Jeongguk’s boxers surfaced in the water and he balled them up before tossing them to shore. Taehyung blinked. Okay, now he was really naked.

“I’ll get you the soap,” Taehyung mumbled as he stepped back onto the rocks to reach a wet hand into the bag. He tossed the partial bar of soap Jeongguk’s way and moved back into the water.

Taehyung tried to forget he was sitting in such close proximity with someone naked as he let the cold water fall over his hair and face. There was nothing weird about it at all. Nothing. He just… yeah. He had been alone far too long.

“Is t-t-the water s-supposed to b-burn this b-b-bad?” Jeongguk’s teeth were chattering so badly Taehyung wanted to throw his hands up and rush him back to the fire.

“It’s fucking cold out here, so uh, yeah. Just, uhm, keep your leg straight. The water is good for it. You just need to rush a little and clean off.” He pulled the soap out of Jeongguk’s open palm and began running it down his arms, shifting to his knees for better access. Jeongguk’s eyes were squeezed shut, the only noise was his chattering teeth.

After he lathered some soap into Jeongguk’s hair, he pulled away swiftly and pointed to the water with the lump balled in his hand. “Rinse, and then we’ll get you back by the fire.”

“T-t-thank y-you,” he mumbled, sinking under the water. Taehyung shook his head and began to quickly clean himself off as well. He realized then that the only clothes he had brought had been for Jeongguk, which meant he had nothing.

Way to be prepared, Kim.

Taehyung clambered out of the water and pulled his old clothes back on, a small chill running down his back as they pressed against his skin. Then he threw the towel over his arm before helping Jeongguk stand up. Taehyung closed his eyes to provide some form of privacy as Jeongguk wrapped the towel around his body, teeth still clacking together a mile a minute.

“We’re doing this again, kid,” Taehyung demanded, not waiting for a response before scooping the small man into his arms, bending down slightly to retrieve his bag. Jeongguk curled against his chest, his hands shaking as they were folded tightly around Taehyung’s neck.

Neither of them said a single word until they were back inside the house, Taehyung setting Jeongguk carefully down next to the fireplace. He knelt down and reached for the stoker to raise the flame a little bit. Jeongguk looked ready to burn his own skin off with how close he was getting to the flame. With a wary look, Taehyung held his hand out in front of Jeongguk’s bare chest and raised an eyebrow when he got a weird glance in response.

“G-god, how do you d-do that f-f-frequently?”

Taehyung shrugged. “I wouldn’t be able to bathe all winter if I only did it when it was warm. Not fit for life in the Wasteland, are you, kid?”

“‘P-parentally not,” he mumbled, scooting even closer to the fire to shove his hands out in front of him. Taehyung leaned back on his knees, tugging the bag he had abandoned towards Jeongguk.

“Clothes are in there. I’m gonna change into some warmer ones and go finish washing stuff. I don’t want you to move. You’re injured.”

“B-but--”

“You’ll stop chattering if you get warmer, kid, so stay in here and do what I said. I’ll be back in an hour tops, okay?”

“F-fine.” Jeongguk looked back at the fire in disappointment, but Taehyung noticed his hands were already slowing in their shaking. Personally, he wanted to do this alone anyways. He could go back to his daydream of being alone again.

\---

After Taehyung had hung his clothes out back (Yeah, he knew they weren’t going to dry anytime soon, but it was better to get them not dripping before he brought them inside) he made his way back inside the house to see Jeongguk fully dressed, the towel hung over the side of the bed and the radio on a low hum. He still sat by the fire with his injured leg outstretched as he stared into the dying flames with such an interest you might have thought he was seeing into the future or something.

Taehyung cleared his throat to alert him, and Jeongguk twisted his neck to give a small smile and a wiggle of his fingers.

“Hey, there.”

“Hi.” He tossed his jacket over the back of the chair and plopped down on the floor next to Jeongguk, glancing over at him for a second before distracting himself in taking off his shoes.

“Thank you for listening to Gwangju City Radio, your number one stop for the best hits in the Wasteland! I’m Park ‘Sexy’ Jimin, your fine host, telling you that it is a cold one out there today! It’s not quite freezing, but the temps making its way there. Stay safe out there travelers, and if you’re around, come stop by my good friend Namjoon’s shop. He makes the meanest cup of coffee in the Wasteland! Now back to the music. Here’s Journey with Faithfully."

“So you stayed busy,” Taehyung pointed out as he nervously ran a hand through his unruly, still wet (and sort of frozen) hair. Jeongguk shrugged.

“I wouldn’t call getting dressed and turning on the radio staying busy, but sure. How was laundry?”

Taehyung sighed. “Tedious.”

“Yeah.” Jeongguk began picking at his fingernails. “Can I ask you something that uh, might be a little personal?”

Taehyung’s entire body tensed up like his body was preparing him for flight or fight. Taehyung didn’t talk about things; he had nobody to talk to. Everything he had to talk about he locked deep inside of him, planning on never opening it up ever again. Taehyung, an emotionless brick wall, was certainly not about to let this stupid city dweller ask him a personal question.

Just say no, just say no, just say--

“Sure.”

Goddammit, you stupid idiot!

“You uhm… uh…” Jeongguk rubbed at his face when his words hit a dead end. He looked at Taehyung for a second before his eyes flickered back to the fire. “You lived in a closed community. What was that like?”

Choose the flight option, flee! FLEE!

Taehyung swallowed hard and let his eyes fall to his lap. He strung his fingers through the empty spaces of one another. “It wasn’t nice.”

“Is that number a… did they brand you?”

“I think it’s more of a tattoo. It was used as an identification source. Like, ‘Number 875, please make your way to the principal’s office’ kind of thing. Trust me, I’ve tried to get it off, but it won’t budge. I’ve had it since birth.”

“And all the scars on your back. Is that from--”

“Let’s just say I wasn’t a very good kid when I was younger,” he interrupted sharply, voice retreating back to its resting tone of a grunt. Jeongguk started wringing his hands.

“I’m so sorry they did that to you. You don’t… you don’t deserve a punishment like that. Nobody does.” His voice was full of so much sympathy Taehyung was back to thinking about Jin.

“Everyone had to be exactly the same. ‘Fair is Equal,’ the Overseer always said, but that was stupid. The government was stupid. It was all stupid.” He shook his head. “I didn’t want to be the same as everyone else. I didn’t like that. I didn’t want to look at my brother and see myself because I wanted us to be our own persons. I didn’t want to think about the lies my father told me every morning. I didn’t like to think about my real life. So I buried myself in illegal literature and pretended I could hide away in pre-war life.” Taehyung scoffed loudly, placing both his hands on either side of his head. “I thought leaving would be a new life for me.”

“And it wasn’t?”

“It was. Jin… that was my friend. He…” A pause. “He took me under his wing and taught me everything I know. Every damn thing I’m capable of doing today is thanks to him. But all good things have to come to an end, I guess.”

“Thanks for telling me.” His voice wasn’t higher than a murmur, but Taehyung still felt like an idiot. Who dropped personal information on one person they met two days ago?

Apparently him.

And to make things worse, Jeongguk was the first person he had given into since Jin.

“Yeah. Whatever.” His tough guy act was back.

They stayed quiet the rest of the night, listening to the radio and the crackling of the fire. Neither said a word as Taehyung made dinner, as they ate, not even to make witty comments about the radio host. Normally, Taehyung would have enjoyed the peace and quiet, but something was different. For some reason he found himself wanting Jeongguk to say something, to ask him another question, to complain about the cold or his injury. He wondered if Jeongguk was staying quiet simply for Taehyung’s preference.

He hoped he hadn’t scared the kid away.

\---

Taehyung was nodding off before Jeongguk that night, drained of all his energy from a day of long work. The background noises didn’t help his groggy state either, and he curled up in that chair with an open book still on his lap as eyelids fluttered shut.

“Sleep tight, Taehyung,” he thought he heard Jeongguk say before the light snapped off.

He could have sworn Jeongguk pressed his lips to his forehead.

But then again, Taehyung could have been dreaming.


	4. Confusion

Jeongguk stayed with Taehyung for the next week and a half.

During that time, Taehyung had to take out Jeongguk’s stitches, and once again, the kid didn’t make a single sound. He really wanted to know how Jeongguk was able to have a tolerance that high. One day he’d ask. Not today, definitely not tomorrow, but one day.

Ever since that night he had given in and told Jeongguk something personal, Taehyung had been on high alert. He stopped trying to make chitchat, and Jeongguk did too. Their conversations were brief and nothing more than the occasional “Thanks” or “Goin’ out.”

Jeongguk was getting better, though. The infection was gone, and his skin had returned back to its normal color. He told Taehyung he might be able to leave in a few days.

“That’s good,” Taehyung had said, his face bearing no emotion, but he didn’t really feel that way. A part of him didn’t want Jeongguk to ever leave.

But Jeongguk was leaving. He was leaving and then everything would go back to how it had been before he had come into Taehyung’s life and ruined everything.

On the morning of the third week since Jeongguk came to stay with him, Taehyung was outside checking the defense lines when he heard something he had never heard before in his entire life.

It was a loud rumble that sent him spinning in a frenzy trying to locate the sound.

And then he spotted it.

In the air right above the trees was a rusty black fighter jet.

It looked like it could brush the tips of the trees with how low it was, how elegant and extravagant it was across the blue of the sky.

Taehyung stood with his eyes wide, his hands shaking by his sides. Planes didn’t exist. They hadn’t existed since the war, and, and--

Holy shit, that was a plane that just flew over his head.

Taehyung was throwing open his front door in seconds, causing Jeongguk to almost have a heart attack. He looked at Taehyung in confusion as he barreled through and grabbed Jeongguk by the shoulders.

“There was a plane outside,” he said, not being able to hide his excitement. Jeongguk tilted his head and furrowed his brows in confusion.

“A what?”

“A plane!” Taehyung repeated a little louder before an idea popped into his head. He held up a finger and backed away before turning towards the bookcase to retrieve the overread book with its worn down cover, flipping through a few pages before shoving it into Jeongguk’s hands. Taehyung pointed to the dark green plane in the corner of the open page.

Jeongguk squinted, studying the caption before looking back up at Taehyung’s overly excited expression. “I don’t understand.”

“They had planes before the war. They’re these big heavy machines that can fly. There were passenger planes and fighter planes, and… well, you get the idea. But Jeongguk, all the planes were destroyed during the war, or so I thought.”

He sighed loudly and ran fingers through hair before looking back up at Taehyung. “Are you sure it was a plane?”

“What else would it have been? It wasn’t a passenger plane though, it was one meant for war, skinny and black and so close I could see the rust on it. That means it had to have come from nearby. I don’t know if there are any airports around, but I would assume so since Daegu was a pretty big city.”

“Where would someone get access to a plane?”

Taehyung grabbed the book out of Jeongguk’s hands and pulled out the map in Jin’s box of random junk. Jeongguk watched him closely as he unrolled it and sat down on the bed as well. “Look. Here’s where Daegu is,” he slid his finger up the page, “And that’s where it was heading. It had to have been close to Daegu, or around that area.”

“So it was going north, then?” Jeongguk tried to clarify, his own finger following the path of Taehyung’s. Taehyung nodded.

“I think so.” He stood up, leaving the map in Jeongguk’s lap as he began tossing food and water into his bag. Jeongguk stared at him for a few seconds before shoving the map to the side.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m going after that plane. I have to find out who was flying it, where it came from and how the hell they got it to work.”

“You can’t just up and leave out of the blue!”

“And why is that?” Taehyung stopped short, glaring at the city dweller with crossed arms. “You’re leaving soon anyway. You said so yourself.”

“I…” Jeongguk trailed off, his eyes wandering everywhere but Taehyung. “I have no idea how to get back home.”

His voice came out as a growl. "What?!"

“I wasn’t in charge of leading the caravan, I didn’t pay attention to how to get back, I was just trying not to get killed and get away from those crazy people out in the Wasteland!”

“What, so you thought I would just agree to be your stupid tour guide? Guess again kid, ‘cause that’s not going to happen.” Taehyung went back to packing his bags. Stupid Jeongguk.

“Please, Taehyung, I won’t be able to get home without your help. Nobody knows the Wasteland better than you do! I don’t live out here, I’m going to die if I go out there on my own.”

He snorted, ignoring Jeongguk’s pleading.

“Daejeon is the exact way you want to go, I can help you just as much as you can help me!”

“And how exactly is that? You’re pathetic, Jeongguk.”

“I know people like you know the Wasteland. I can get us supplies, I can help deal with the raiders and--”

Taehyung let out a short, loud laugh. “As if. You know what that means, ‘taking care of raiders?’ It means blowing their brains out. You freaked out about me killing people who were about to murder you. Can you even shoot a gun?”

“I… I had a gun, but--”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

“Taehyung, please. If you just show me, I--”

“Why can’t you understand that I don’t want you to be here?” He was yelling, and for a split second, with a clenched jaw, Jeongguk seemed ready to respond, but just like that, every trace of boldness was gone, replaced with a small, fearful man.

Taehyung stared at him with fury fueling his veins and his hands clenched into fists. He was tired of living the same day over and over again. He hated living life.

All he wanted was Jin back.

“I’m going out,” he muttered before yanking his jacket off the back of the chair and slinking out the front door.

\---

Jeongguk was asleep when Taehyung came back.

He had his head curled under his arm with his eyes squeezed shut and his breathing uneven like he was in the middle of a nightmare.

Taehyung felt terrible.

He didn’t understand why he felt terrible. Jeongguk was just like any other person he ever talked to. He shouldn’t feel terrible, but he did.

With a long sigh, he dropped down into his chair and strung his fingers together. Maybe it would be better to have a companion. If Jeongguk learned to shoot a gun, Taehyung could make use of having back up. They could find that plane twice as fast.

He just didn’t want to get close to any community and certainly didn’t want to risk getting recognized. Taehyung doubted anyone paid any attention to those “Wanted” boards besides raiders anyways, and he killed anyone he came in contact with.

Except for Jeongguk.

But then again, it wasn’t like he could leave the kid to wander the Wasteland like an idiot. He would get himself killed within the first three days. Besides, Taehyung knew it was what Jin would do.

So when Jeongguk woke up, Taehyung was quick to get his answer out before he changed his mind.

“I’ll do it.”

“Huh?” He let out a yawn and rubbed his eyes vigorously before staring at Taehyung with confusion.

So Taehyung repeated, “I’ll do it. I’ll be your stupid tour guide.”

Jeongguk sighed with relief, his hands falling to his sides. “Thank you, thank you, I promise it won’t be a waste of your time--”

“I have rules though. You have to follow my rules and not do anything stupid if you want to not die, understand?” Jeongguk nodded firmly, and Taehyung continued. “Good. We’ll get to that later. First thing is first though: you need to learn how to shoot a gun.”

“But--”

“No buts. If you’re coming with me, you’re learning to defend yourself. I’m not going to be your babysitter, got it?”

“Yes sir,” mumbled Jeongguk with as much enthusiasm as a chair. Satisfied, Taehyung reached for his pistol hung on the wall and thrust it into Jeongguk’s hands. He looked down at the gun like he had been handed a tarantula.

“Grab your jacket and meet me outside,” Taehyung demanded before pushing open the door, leaving Jeongguk to decide what to do with the foreign object in his hand.

\---

“With this particular gun, which is most likely the one you’ll be using, you get ten shots before you need to reload. So you just take the magazine out and put the bullets in, alright?”

Jeongguk nodded, watching closely as Taehyung pointed to where the magazine was.

“You see that tree right there? I want you to aim for the center. It’s not hard.” Taehyung proved his point by taking the gun out of Jeongguk’s shaking hands, clicking the safety off and firing three, loud shots. They hit the center of the tree perfectly, and a smirk rose to his face. Jeongguk pushed his hands over his ears and stepped back in discomfort.

“I don’t want to do this,” he shook his head with wide eyes, and Taehyung grabbed ahold of his shoulder to pull him in front.

“Come on kid, you can do this. Here.” Taehyung thrust the pistol in Jeongguk’s hands, his own hovering until Jeongguk could steady the gun. He raised it, his arms still shaking as he slipped his index finger over the trigger and folded his opposite hand on top. “Okay, so usually you would pull this back to cock it, but this is a semi-automatic so it’s good for now,” Taehyung’s fingers ghosted over Jeongguk’s to move his from the hammer back to the right place, “and this little red thing means the safety is off. Always put the safety on before holstering it, okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Right, so you’re gonna use the sights to line up the barrel with the back of the gun.” This time, Taehyung rested his hands on top of Jeongguk’s to move the gun to the desired position, and when he was satisfied, added, “Now shoot.”

“At the tree?”

“At the tree.”

With a deep breath, Jeongguk pulled the trigger, and the bullet barely brushed the tree. Taehyung rubbed at his face before waving his hand. “Again. I’m not touching you this time.”

He stuck his tongue out in concentration, once again raising the gun before shooting. He shot too high this time.

“That was better. Now do it again.”

“Taehyung--”

“Do it again, kid.”

He sighed but turned back towards the tree and raised the gun again. It didn’t hit the spot Taehyung intended, but as long as Jeongguk could fire it somewhat, he’d be okay. Taehyung planned on doing most of the killing anyway.

While he was busy with his internal monologue, Jeongguk hit the center of the tree, right where Taehyung had hit previously. Jeongguk let out a loud cheer, and Taehyung narrowed his eyes. Hitting the middle on his fourth try was a little suspicious, but then again, it could have simply been beginners luck.

“Nice job kid,” he grunted, and Jeongguk beamed.

\---

“Hey there Wastelanders, it’s your favorite host Chim and you’re listening to Gwangju City Radio! Up next I’ll be playing Hooked on a Feeling by Blue Swede, but first, the news! The temperatures are looking up this weekend, so if you’re planning on traveling this is the time to do it! Next, Vante’s bounty is now up to 2,500 caps, and it seems to be increasing every day. I’ve talked to a few people in town about what they think, and most seem to think he’s simply a legend. What do you think? Hit me up at the studio if you got a sec! Now back to the music!”

“It’s so ridiculous they keep increasing his bounty like he’s real or something,” Jeongguk muttered as he shifted closer to the fire. After a long hour of shooting, Taehyung had replenished the fire and fixed up some dinner for the two of them, his packing long forgotten.

Taehyung shrugged. “People all want something to believe in, I guess.”

“Do you think he’s real?”

“Maybe. No way to really tell, is there?”

“I guess not.” Jeongguk messed with the hem of his shirt. Taehyung couldn’t tell if he was nervous about something or simply bored. “When are we planning on leaving?”

“For Daejeon? I thought tomorrow.”

Jeongguk looked up at him like he was crazy. “Seriously? That early? Don’t you need to get some supplies or something? Oh!" His eyes lit up. "We could go to Gwangju!”

Taehyung was about to say he’d get everything he needed off of raiders and travelers, but something told him slaughtering an entire group of people wasn’t exactly Jeongguk's style. The only problem was, going into that particular city was a poor decision on his part. Someone could recognize him, could trace him to Vante, and then Taehyung’s days in the Wasteland would be cut short. He couldn’t risk it, could he?

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Jeongguk,” he said in a serious tone, not meeting Jeongguk's eyes.

“Why not?”

“Why would we go back only to turn around and head the other way? It’s going to take at least a week to get to Daejeon from where we are now, if not more. Do you wanna add more time on?”

“I know people in Gwangju, remember? A lot of them owe me favors.” He raised an eyebrow, and Taehyung was suddenly curious to how Jeongguk obtained access to these so-called “favors.” How could people be in debt to someone like him?

“Why don’t we stop at a different community somewhere else?”

“Nu-uh. They aren’t big enough to even be called communities. Have you ever left the Daegu area?”

“Not recently,” he grumbled before reaching for the map folded on the seat of his chair. It was an old, pre-war map, with cities and towns still marked on it from before. Jin had added where communities were on it as well, which was extremely helpful to Taehyung.

“Gwangju’s huge, Taehyung, and we can get a lot more than you have now, for really cheap. Trust me on that. I can even get Jimin to talk about that plane on the radio, maybe somebody can give us information.”

Taehyung pondered this. “Can you get him to stop playing so much goddamn Sinatra?”

Jeongguk laughed, the corners of his eyes crinkling and Taehyung felt his stomach doing flips again. Stop it.

“I might be able to.”

“It’s about a three-day journey on top of our other one.”

“We could stay a few days in Gwangju. Come on Taehyung, when’s the last time you got out of the Wasteland and lived a little?”

Taehyung didn’t answer. He went back to looking at the map and dragging his finger over to the poorly drawn star with “Gwangju City” written underneath it in Jin’s scraggly handwriting. Jeongguk was right; they did need better supplies well fitted for a long journey and everything Taehyung had now was not going to suffice.

“Alright, fine, fine. We’ll go to stupid Gwangju City.”

“You won’t regret it, I promise.”

“Better not,” Taehyung mumbled as he leaned over to carefully fold the map back up. Jeongguk watched him with large eyes as he stowed it away on the shelf, his fingers trailing lighting across his books.

“Will you tell me more about the pre-war stuff?”

He whipped his head back around, leaning forward as if that would somehow let him hear what Jeongguk said again. “Really?”

“Yeah. Besides planes, what did they have?”

“They had all kinds of things,” Taehyung started as he sat back down in front of the fire, “cars and planes and tanks and submarines. You know what cars are, right?”

“Er, maybe.”

“All those huge rusting pieces of metal lying around? Some of them have windows and tires still. Those are cars. People used to use them as a form of transportation. It was much faster than walking.” He sighed. “Wish I had a car.”

“What’s a submarine?”

“It’s like an underwater plane, kind of. People could stay in them without getting wet and go deep into the ocean. They could breathe in them too. Man, do I wish I could see the ocean.” A pause, and then a simple shrug. “Tanks were used a lot in World War II. That was a long time ago. And then World War I wasn’t even always called that. They used to call it the Great War because they thought that would be the last time the world would have a war of that size.”

“That didn’t turn out the way they planned, huh?” Jeongguk chuckled. “Kind of ironic.”

“Yeah, it is. You know in World War II was the first time nuclear warfare was introduced? I wish that would have never happened. I could have a television, and a car, and--”

“Not everything is all bad, right? I mean, we still have electricity and radio, so that’s good right?”

“Running water too,” Taehyung added under his breath before answering Jeongguk's question. “Yeah, that’s a good thing. I just... if there hadn’t been a war, I could have had more books.”

“We have a library in Daejeon, you know.” Jeongguk's voice was soft, his hands back to messing with his shirt. “It’s full of all the books bartered for and found around the city ruins. It’s actually pretty big.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Nope! Not a lot of people go in there though. You’d probably be all alone.”

The thought of being alone surrounded by so many books overwhelmed him. Usually, when he got lost in his daydreams, Taehyung thought of having a library of his own. He thought about how people used to have shelves of books in their homes with so many choices Taehyung surely wouldn’t be able to pick just one. An actual, real-life library.

“I can go in?”

Jeongguk nodded vigorously, a large grin plastered across his face. “Of course you can! It’s the least I can do.”

“I uhm,” he swallowed, “thank you. That uh, uhm, yeah, uh, means a lot.”

“You don’t have to keep up the tough guy act all the time you know,” Jeongguk said quietly like he wasn’t sure if he wanted to say it. “I know living out here has gotta suck, but you can trust me, Taehyung.”

“Don’t blame me for not trusting anyone. Last person I trusted got murdered.” Taehyung looked at Jeongguk with so much contempt the kid seemed to crumble right on the spot. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he ducked his face and ran his fingers through his hair.

“It’s hard, losing someone. Trust me, I know.”

Taehyung scoffed, pulling his glare away from the city dweller back to the dying flames. He didn’t bother poking at it, too lost in his own grief.

“My brother Junghyun got really ill when I was a teenager. He wasn’t much younger than me, but he went from always running around with the other kids to being able to barely move his head. Each day we watched him get sicker and sicker, and the doctor couldn’t do anything about it. They told us he had radiation poisoning.” Jeongguk sniffled, raising a hand to wipe the back of his nose. Taehyung could tell he was starting to cry without even looking. “It turned out Junghyun wasn’t the only one that got it. The town went into a panic; everyone was afraid of dying and the government spent forever quarantining and cleaning the water and stuff. It was a shitty time in my life.” He rolled his shoulders back, sniffing again. “I didn’t want to really be around death after that.”

“Yeah, I don’t blame you,” Taehyung muttered quietly. That was when he felt Jeongguk's hand settle down on top of his.

Jeongguk was freezing, and he jumped a little in surprise, planning on pulling away.

But he didn’t.

Taehyung just looked over at Jeongguk's big warm eyes, the corners of his mouth tilted up into a small smile. “It’s not good to keep things bottled inside. One day you might explode.” His hand moved up his arm, sending a shiver through Taehyung’s body until it cupped his cheek, thumb resting on his cheekbone. Taehyung closed his eyes.

“I don’t do mushy stuff,” he grumbled, hating the fact that he wasn’t strong enough to tell Jeongguk to stop touching him.

“That’s okay. You don’t have to break down the walls just yet. Just know I’m here, alright? I’m your friend.”

“I don’t have friends.”

“Agree to disagree,” Jeongguk chuckled, and suddenly his mouth was right by his ear, his breath warm against Taehyung's skin. “I’ll be here when you’re ready.”

Taehyung couldn’t believe how pathetic he was right at this moment, quivering under a stupid little city dweller. He was a raider, the most wanted man in the Wasteland, an emotionless killing machine. He murdered and stole because he could, he was the definition of intimidating, he--

He couldn’t breathe.

Suddenly Jeongguk pressed a feather-light kiss to his lips, pulling back slightly to hover millimeters apart, and he resisted every urge to slam his lips against Jeongguk's and make it even worse. What was this stupid kid doing?

His skin felt barren when Jeongguk pulled away from him.

“That stubble’s a weird feeling when you’re kissing someone,” he commented with a chuckle, and Taehyung shook his head as he blinked a few times.

“We aren’t talking about this ever again.” He felt angry with himself all of a sudden, and Taehyung really didn’t want to take it out on Jeongguk. He could feel the kid’s eyes on him as he pushed up off the floor and slid his jacket on quickly before pulling a gun off the rack. “I need some fresh air before we leave tomorrow.”

“It’s dark outside. You could get hurt or something.”

“I don’t care.” He swung his bag over his shoulders, ignoring the pain in Jeongguk's eyes.

“I’m sorry Taehyung, I didn’t know, I wasn’t thinking--”

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” Taehyung interrupted, looking at him with a look of anger before disappearing out the door.

\---

He woke Jeongguk up early. “We’re leaving in ten.”

Jeongguk rubbed his eyes as Taehyung finished packing all his bags. Making long trips was a little annoying at times, simply because all the extra weight tended to slow him down. Taehyung still couldn’t believe he had agreed to all of this.

“Do you want some help?”

Taehyung tossed Jeongguk a long-sleeved shirt and a new pair of pants as he began digging out clothes to shove into the bag. “No. Just get dressed.”

Jeongguk didn’t answer as he stripped out of his clothes, still watching Taehyung. When he finished with the clothes and made sure he had food, medicine, water, and money, (He really hadn’t had a use for it until now) Taehyung went to wrap his hands with cloth all the way to the crook of his elbow. Then he strapped on his holsters and reached for his guns.

“I got an extra holster for you. You can hold just the one gun.”

“I--”

“I realize you only had an hour worth of practice, but it’s better that you know how at least in case of an emergency. I’m sure I’ll be doing most of the shooting anyway.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

“C’mere, let me wrap your hands.” He beckoned Jeongguk over with a wave of his hands and gently pulled the cloth over Jeongguk's cold hands three times before tying it off at his elbow. Jeongguk swallowed loudly, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he watched Taehyung’s fingers on his skin. With a scowl, Taehyung pulled away and tossed him the other holster. “That goes around your waist.”

“Taehyung...” Jeongguk sighed loudly. “Can we please talk about yesterday?”

“No.” One semi on either side, sword across his back, shotgun in his hands--

“Please.”

“I said no.” Taehyung reached for two of his bags, slinging them across his back before tossing the other two at Jeongguk. “Before we leave, I’m establishing some rules.” He narrowed his eyes at Jeongguk who was looking at the floor, snapping his fingers to catch his attention. “Listen to me.”

“I am,” he muttered.

“You stay by my side at all times. If you leave for any reason or at any moment, we’re going to have a problem, got it, kid?” A nod full of fear. “You make use of all the bullets in that gun. Ammo is hard to come by. Cities may be your territory, but the Wasteland is mine. Out here, I’m in charge. You do what I say and you don’t complain.” Another nod. “I don’t want to hear any noise from you at any time during our trip. It’s going to be a lot of walking and it’s not going to be pleasant outside. Lastly, you don’t say a single word about what happened last night. It’s never going to happen again.”

“Taehyung,” Jeongguk reached out for his arm and Taehyung slammed him against the wall, shoving his hand around his throat with a growl.

“Don’t touch me.”

With a look that could kill, he pulled away with a huff. This was going to be a painfully awkward journey for the next few weeks.

Jeongguk had so much fear in his eyes as Taehyung busied himself doing some last minute checks. The fire was dead, cabin cleaned, defense system good, house key in his pocket, gear on...

They were good to go.

Taehyung waited until Jeongguk had slung his own bags over his shoulders before handing him his own gun for the next few weeks; then they were out the door and through the trees.


	5. Journey

Neither of them said a single word the rest of the day.

It was a pretty good day of travel, up until Taehyung realized he had forgotten his Walkman in all the anger and felt even worse than he had before. It wasn’t like they could go back.

So, they walked in silence.

Most of day one would be spent walking through the ruins of Daegu, which was mostly jumping over stuff and walking around others. They didn’t come across a lot of people surprisingly, but Taehyung was on high alert. He usually was.

Sometimes Jeongguk looked ready to say something, but he never did. Taehyung was afraid he might lose his temper if Jeongguk ever did say something to him. It wasn’t like he was furious with Jeongguk; no, he was more pissed with himself for stooping to that level. He was angry that he let down his walls with some stupid stranger he would never see again after this.

Most of all, Taehyung was angry that Jeongguk was making him feel this way.

It had been a while since Taehyung had been down this path. He remembered the way there of course; Taehyung didn’t think he could ever forget that. Most of it was walking down what had been an old highway, one straight shot after you managed to find your way out of Daegu.

He looked at his feet as he walked, one in front of the other as he tried to avoid large cracks and weeds. It was warmer than it had been, but the wind was harsh and frigid, even with his gear. Jeongguk didn’t have anything protecting his face at all.

At one point Jeongguk started humming and Taehyung didn’t tell him to stop. He secretly liked the noise; it was a change from the cold wind and the dusty Wasteland. Occasionally, Taehyung looked over at Jeongguk through a sideways glance, curiosity getting the better of him. Jeongguk had only a slight limp, but his leg didn’t seem to be bothering him too badly, which was great. He opened his mouth to ask if he needed to sit down, but Taehyung remembered how much pride Jeongguk had and didn’t want to embarrass him or something.

Since day one was the toughest, Taehyung wanted to get as many miles in as possible so they ate on the go, passing a water bottle back and forth without much conversation and snacking on nuts and dried meat. He felt bad for yelling at the kid this morning. Taehyung was short tempered, he got extremely angry, and he had a commitment problem. Trusting, believing, talking about things… Taehyung didn’t do that. He lived to the beat of his own drum and he didn’t let stupid city dwellers with pretty eyes and nice hands tell him what to do or control him.

So why was his stupid life suddenly being ruined by Jeongguk?

He snickered a little, earning him a small glance from his companion. It was just amusing to him that after so long, this one dude he met three weeks ago was causing him to question his entire sanity.

\---

“We’re stopping in a bit. There’s an old motel on the way.” Taehyung muttered quietly after dropping the bandana down around his neck and placing his glasses on his head, allowing himself to stare at the setting sun that had almost fully dipped under the horizon. He couldn’t see as well in the dark as he could during the day, which pissed him off a lot, but there wasn’t much he could do for that.

Jeongguk looked up at him with wide eyes, probably shocked Taehyung had even responded with something that wasn’t a grunt. He nodded his head, directing his attention back to the ground. He stepped over a shifted part in the cement and winced as his bad leg dragged behind him. That caused Taehyung to stop walking and cross his arms across his chest as he watched Jeongguk stiffen with each new step.

“Something you want to tell me?”

“Hmm?” Jeongguk turned around, gulping at Taehyung’s defensive stance. He froze, his eyes jolting everywhere except Taehyung.

“Is there something you want to tell me, Jeongguk?”

His neck twitched, hands twisting together. “N-no.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

“Because it sure looks like there's something you want to tell me.”

“No.” A sigh. “Okay. Maybe.”

“Leg hurting?”

“Yes. Pretty bad actually.”

Taehyung sighed this time. “You’re an idiot, you know that?” he moved closer to Jeongguk, who flinched and immediately backed up a little, tripping over a crack in the road and falling onto his butt. He grimaced again, shoving his head in his hands. Taehyung crouched down next to him, laying a hand gently on his shoulder.

“Jeongguk. If your leg hurt so badly, why didn’t you just say so?”

He peeked between the cracks of his fingers. “I… uh, well…” Jeongguk trailed off, dropping his hands to his sides. He picked at weeds before moving to push himself up off the ground. Taehyung raised an eyebrow, still not buying Jeongguk's act.

“Jeongguk.” He said his name a little sterner, hoping he would get the hint. Jeongguk only grunted and took a few steps away from Taehyung farther down the road. With a shake of his head, Taehyung straightened his posture, cracked his knuckles, and caught Jeongguk's pace.

“How much longer ‘till the motel?”

“We’re about a few miles off. You wanna sit down for a bit? We’re making good time here.”

Jeongguk shook his head firmly as he tucked his hands into his pockets. “No. It’s not safe. Who knows what’s out there.” he shivered, glancing behind him just to make sure nothing was there. Taehyung rolled his eyes, resting a hand on the small of his back. It caused Jeongguk to flinch again, and Taehyung recoiled like he had been burned, clearing his throat.

“Right. Okay. Let’s keep going.”

They went back to being quiet.

Taehyung kept an eye out on Jeongguk this time, more than he had the rest of the day. Knowing Jeongguk was in pain and was continuing to walk like he was fine was not something that pleased Taehyung. He wanted to scoop Jeongguk into his arms and carry him the rest of the way, but something told him Jeongguk wouldn’t exactly like that.

So he continued to watch.

\---

When that shitty motel was in view, Taehyung shoved an arm out in front of Jeongguk to stop him from moving and put a finger over his lips. He listened quietly, trying to see if any raiders had made it their home in the years since he had visited. Taehyung couldn’t hear anything, but he removed his shotgun just in case, gesturing that Jeongguk ready his gun as well. With shaky hands, Jeongguk pulled his pistol out of the holster and held it tightly, waiting for Taehyung’s lead.

Taehyung went into sneak mode, moving stealthily on the balls of his feet before crouching down behind an old car. Jeongguk looked at him with wide eyes, one hand over his mouth to muffle his loud and anxious breathing.

“Don’t panic yet,” Taehyung whispered. “Stay here.”

Jeongguk happily obeyed, watching as Taehyung rolled out to the front of the car and moved closer towards the motel. Half of it was completely caved in on itself, with only a few shingles remaining on the roof. The right side was more of a barren skeleton with its windows shattered and its walls deteriorated from years of disuse. You know, minus the nuclear fire.

The left side was doing much better, and Taehyung could pinpoint the exact room Jin and he had stayed in the last time they had made the road trip to Gwangju. He kicked open the slouching door, the bang of it on the wall echoing madly across the empty lobby. Taehyung let out a low whistle between his teeth, listening for any footsteps or the loading of a weapon.

Nothing.

With a satisfied grin, Taehyung turned to call for Jeongguk when something hard hit him in the head, blurring his vision and sending a roaring headache spreading throughout his brain. His gun scattered across the broken tile of the lobby floor, a grunt escaping his lips as his back hit the wall and a low cackle came from the man who was now holding a knife to his neck.

“Well looky here, seems like I’ve found a rat!”

Through his double vision, Taehyung could see the man speaking was bald, his smile a mouthful of yellow and missing teeth. He groaned again, lifting his head up just a little bit to avoid having the knife go through his jaw.

“What do you think you’re doing here?”

“This is mine,” Taehyung said firmly, feeling for another weapon. The man seemed to realize what he was doing and kneed him in the crotch, pulling out both of Taehyung’s pistols and tossing them to the floor with his shotgun as Taehyung himself let out a grunt of pain.

“Not so fast,” he titled his head slightly, that slimy smile still on his face. The man pressed the knife harder into Taehyung’s neck, a small drop of red rising to the surface. He traded the point for the flat side to the skin, sliding it up until it was resting on his Adam’s apple. Taehyung glared at him in disgust, his nostrils flaring. He couldn’t believe some lowlife raider had got the jump on him. One stupid slipup…

Then Taehyung caught sight of Jeongguk peering at him from behind the front wall of the building, his eyes full of fear. Taehyung looked back to the raider, not wanting to catch his attention and have him see Jeongguk. He thought Taehyung was alone. Good.

He needed to stall this asshole so Jeongguk could clip his ass. The only problem was, Taehyung wasn’t sure if Jeongguk would actually do that.

“What are you gonna do, kill me?” Taehyung laughed mockingly, wiggling underneath the grip of the raider. The man narrowed his eyes, pressing the knife even harder into his neck. Taehyung could tell this guy was new to the whole “raider” thing.

“I won’t kill you if you get out of here. Don’t know if you know anything, but out here in the Wasteland, there aren’t no rules.”

“Well considering I had this motel claimed first, guess you’re gonna have to kill me.” Taehyung shrugged underneath him, a smirk rising to his face as the guy blinked in confusion. He let up on his pressure, and Taehyung guessed the guy didn’t think he’d get this far.

“Don’t try me you freak, I know exactly what I’m doing, and I will kill you!”

“Then do it.”

They went head to head in a staring contest, the raider’s breathing heavy until he looked like he was finally going to man up and do something. The knife went back to pushing into his skin, and for a second, it seemed it was going to slit across his throat. Up until his brain exploded, spraying Taehyung with a whole lot of blood and bits of brain matter, the man’s corpse slumping forward onto him. Taehyung blinked in surprise before looking forward. There stood Jeongguk with the gun held out directly in front of him, both his shaky hands wrapped around the trigger. He let it fall to the floor almost immediately, his body almost curling in on itself as he let out a sob and dropped to his knees. Taehyung looked at him in sympathy before shoving the dead raider off of him so he could kneel next to Jeongguk. He awkwardly rested a hand on Jeongguk's back, not knowing what else to do.

“Hey, it’s okay. Everything’s over now.” Jeongguk shifted his posture to wrap his arms around Taehyung’s neck, and in surprise, he let out a soft noise before moving his own to the small of his back. Taehyung had no idea what to say. He realized Jeongguk didn’t like death, didn’t like killing and murdering people, but he had just saved Taehyung’s life, which sounded crazy when he thought about it.

Jeongguk was still crying uncontrollably, his breaths coming out ragged as he hiccuped and gasped for air. Taehyung bit his tongue as he thought of something to say.

“I know it’s uh, hard, to do that, but you saved my--” Taehyung cleared his throat, “life. As much as I hate to say it.”

Jeongguk sniffed and pulled off of Taehyung. He rubbed his eyes and nose before looking into the darkness behind him. Taehyung offered a comforting smile when Jeongguk looked back at him. “S-sorry, I just, I’ve never killed someone before. It… it doesn’t feel right. I feel dirty, I feel--”

“But you saved mine. Isn’t my life a little better than some dirty raider who was going to kill me? I mean. Jesus, Guk, I could have died.” (He probably wouldn’t have died, but he wanted to make Jeongguk feel better about the situation.)

Jeongguk sniffed again and intertwined his fingers. “You called me Guk.”

“Oh, sorry. Wasn’t really thinking.”

“No, s’okay. I like it.” A shrug. “I guess you’re right.” He looked over at the body, a wave of shivers moving through his body as he squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t like looking at it.”

“Let’s go to the room then,” Taehyung offered, pushing himself off the ground before taking Jeongguk's hand. He ignored his urge to loot the body, thinking Jeongguk would probably strongly dislike that particular idea. He’d come back and do that later without Jeongguk around.

The room Jin and Taehyung had stayed in so long ago really hadn’t been touched. There was still the old radio in the corner of the room, the broken dresser that slanted to the right, the dusty plush chair in the corner that was probably infested with disease. The only thing that was different was that there was only one mattress now instead of two. Taehyung internally groaned. The motel had been looted a long time ago and he doubted anything was left. Not to mention, it was starting to get pretty dark outside and the room was getting harder and harder to see in.

“You can have the bed,” he mumbled before sliding his bags to the floor. Taehyung knew he had a blanket in a bag somewhere.

“There’s enough room for two,” Jeongguk pointed out, oblivious to Taehyung’s irritation. “Or we could drag another one in here. It’s a motel; there’s bound to be another one.”

“You can go ahead and look if you want, but a lot of the rooms are either ridiculously hard to get into, destroyed, or looted. Thus why there’s only one mattress remaining. You can have it, I don’t care. You need it more than me.”

“Sorry I was such a baby,” he said softly, dropping his own bags to the floor before sitting on the mattress. “I just--”

“You don’t need to apologize. Just take the bed, alright? I’m gonna go back out and grab our guns before I forget or they get stolen or something, I don’t know.” With an irritated grumble, Taehyung left the room before Jeongguk could say anything else. Even though the kid had prevented Taehyung from bleeding to death, he was still pissed at him. And really, still, his rage wasn’t at Jeongguk, it was at himself. Taehyung was an idiot, and he knew it.

Maybe he just needed to go with it.

Taehyung was so desperate to hold onto the past that he didn’t think about his future. He lived day by day, wishing he could have Jin back, wishing he lived before the war, wishing --

He laughed out loud and ran a hand through his hair. He really needed to stop overthinking things like this.

\---

Jeongguk was laying on his back when Taehyung came in. He sat up as Taehyung dropped his weapons next to the bags. (Taehyung had checked the body of that stupid raider. He had nothing on him.)

“Hey.”

“Hey.” Taehyung sat at the end of the mattress and pulled his knees up to his chest with a sigh. “I uhm… can we talk?”

Jeongguk blinked, his eyes widening in surprise. “I uh, sure. Okay. Yeah.”

“I’m sorry I yelled at you. Like, for real sorry, not I’m going to apologize and then be a dick to you again five minutes later.” He raked fingers through his hair nervously, pausing to look at Jeongguk's expression before continuing. “I… I don’t know exactly how to put it, and I know I’ve said it before, but I… I’m not good at interacting with people. You’re the first person I’ve had a decent conversation with in six years, and I dunno, you… you make me feel all weird and stuff.”

“...Weird and stuff?”

“Let me uhm…” he started rubbing the back of his neck, still not looking Jeongguk in the eye. God, what was he trying to do again? “I’m not good at explaining things. My er, feelings and stuff.”

“Right.” Jeongguk was smiling now. “Let’s just talk about a different subject, okay? Like, what’s your favorite color?”

“I don’t think I have one.”

“Everyone has a favorite color.”

Taehyung shrugged. “Never thought about it.”

“Well, you can think about it overnight and tell me tomorrow. Sound good?”

“Sure.”

“You know, my offer still stands. There’s enough room for two people. The floor sucks to sleep on, you and I both know that. Besides, I stole your bed from you for three weeks. You need this more than I do. And if you don’t want to, then I’ll sleep on the floor.”

Taehyung didn’t say anything, because he knew if he did it would come out as sarcastic or rude and he swore that wasn’t his intent. So instead, he scooted up to the top of the mattress and laid down on his back, ignoring the dip as Jeongguk settled next to him.

“I can take the first watch,” Taehyung murmured as he intertwined his fingers and laid them across his chest. “One of us should be awake, just in case.”

“You need your sleep, Taehyung. Let me take the first watch. I promise I’ll wake you up.”

He sighed but nodded his head in the darkness. “Yeah, alright. Thanks.”

“My pleasure.”

Taehyung closed his eyes, his mind on nothing but his breathing, and it didn’t take long before he was out cold.

\---

The following morning, Taehyung awoke to sunlight streaming in through the window of the motel room. He blinked a couple of times, letting out a loud yawn before he realized just what exactly he had woken up too.

Taehyung had his head on Jeongguk's chest, one of his legs pulled over Jeongguk's waist and his arm around his neck. His face began burning up as he quickly untangled his limbs from Jeongguk's and rolled off the bed in a giant heap.

And to make things even worse, there was a very obvious tent in his wrinkled, tighter than usual jeans.

“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath with a sigh. Damn his stupid fucking body. How was he supposed to explain this to Jeongguk? Taehyung was pretty good at making up excuses, but the fact of the matter was that this was caused by another, er, dream, and Taehyung was sick and tired of his stupid brain.

A yawn made Taehyung’s face turn even redder once he realized Jeongguk was awake now. He smacked his lips a few times and stretched before giving a groggy “Good morning,” to Taehyung.

“Er, hey.” Taehyung pretended to rifle through the bags.

“Sorry I didn’t wake you up last night. I was going to, I promise, but you looked like you really needed the sleep and I didn’t want to wake you up. I promise I wasn’t asleep for long, just, uh, well,” Out of the corner of his eye Taehyung watched Jeongguk rub his face vigorously and stretch his arms, “I didn’t really take you as the cuddler type.”

“I’m not,” he grumbled under his breath as Jeongguk burst into laughter. Taehyung decided he was searching for food.

“I mean, it’s alright, I didn’t mind. It was freezing last night and you kept me warm.”

Oh dear lord, this was not helping Taehyung’s current state.

“Yeah, I uhm, I gotta get some fresh air.” Without looking back at Jeongguk's face, Taehyung stumbled out of the room, using the wall for support. He couldn’t believe this.

The minute he reached the lobby Taehyung was shoving a hand down his pants, leaning his head against the wall as he pumped a good three dry strokes. A small noise of pleasure escaped his mouth and his hand came back out.

“Fuck everything,” he grunted, palming his stupid morning wood through his pants. Taehyung prayed Jeongguk hadn’t seen anything, because if he had Taehyung was utterly and completely screwed.

Jeongguk was packing everything up when Taehyung came back into the room. Truthfully, he wasn’t completely satisfied, but he refused to give his stupid body the satisfaction it wanted.

“How’s the air?”

“Cold.” Taehyung hooked his fingers through his belt loops and hiked his pants higher up his waist. “You got everything packed?”

“Uh, yeah. Did you want breakfast?”

“Probably a good idea. There’s bread somewhere in there. S’got carbs and stuff.”

“Right, right.” Jeongguk raised an eyebrow, his eyes narrowing. Taehyung swallowed nervously and pulled at his shirt collar. Don’t say anything, don’t say anything, please don’t say anything.

“Something wrong?”

“No. Just wondering what took you so long out there.”

“What, a man can’t get some fresh air?” Taehyung cleared his throat, willing himself not to blush. Come on you heartless bastard, you aren’t about to blush in front of this stupid city dweller.

“Sure you can. Ok, food, and then we leave.”

\---

Five minutes later they were back on the move, and Taehyung was feeling a lot better. Of course, he couldn’t stop thinking about that stupid dream he had, but dreams were dreams and this was a cold, harsh reality he was living.

“We’re about four miles ahead of schedule, so we can take it leisurely today. If at any time today you need to sit down, for the love of God please tell me. If you don’t, I’ll kick your ass.”

Jeongguk rolled his eyes. “I promise I’m fine. If I need to stop, I’ll tell you.”

“Thank you.” A pause, and then a long sigh. “Blue.”

“Huh?” Jeongguk looked over at him in confusion, waiting for Taehyung to clarify.

“My favorite color is blue. That’s what I decided.”

“Oh! Right. Yes. That’s a good one.” Jeongguk went back to looking at the cracked asphalt, taking a break to maneuver around a wreck of a car. Sometimes Taehyung expected terrible things to come climbing out of those.

Taehyung also expected Jeongguk to say something more, but he never did. They walked in complete silence for almost an hour, the only noises from the wind shifting random cars on the road. He was almost tempted to tie his bandana over his mouth, (there wasn’t a lot of dust out on the highway, but hey, it’s good to be careful) since they obviously weren’t going to be talking anymore. Until,

“Hey, Taehyung?”

“What?”

“So uhm, this morning, when you woke up, and then I woke up… what were you dreaming about last night?”

“Nothing,” Taehyung was quick to reply, his pace quickening. Jeongguk matched it perfectly.

“Are you sure about that? Cause I was awake, remember?”

“Yes, I’m sure.” Fuck, now his face was turning red again. Taehyung ducked his head to the best of his ability so Jeongguk couldn’t see.

“I mean, you were out in the lobby for quite a long time… and you seemed to be in a hurry this morning…”

“Drop it,” Taehyung growled, but instead of recoiling, as usual, Jeongguk started laughing.

“Oh man, your face is so red! I’ve never seen you like this!”

“Stop it,” he muttered, ducking his head again. Jeongguk laughed again.

“It’s okay, Taehyung, we all get ‘em. It’s a normal thing.”

“Just drop it, okay? I don’t want to talk about this with you. God, go back to being silent.” Taehyung sped up again, weaving in between another set of cars. Jeongguk hung back this time, the smile wiped off his face.

Taehyung would never tell Jeongguk what he had been dreaming about, strictly because he knew Jeongguk wouldn’t let him hear the end of it, and Taehyung knew he would be red in the face, and Taehyung did not want to blush again in front of him.

They actually stopped to eat this time, sitting down right in front of a car missing all its windows and two tires. Taehyung leaned against the cool metal with a sigh as he pulled his bags out in front of him. Jeongguk did the same, refusing to look him in the eye.

“I’m sorry about earlier,” he murmured, and Taehyung shrugged his shoulders.

“Whatever.”

“Wasn’t right of me to tease you.”

“It’s fine. Forget about it.” he forced a smile before pulling out the last water bottle in the bag. Jeongguk frowned.

“Are we--”

“We walked about forty miles yesterday, so we’ll have another forty today and then we’ll get to Gwangju about tomorrow evening. Sound alright, or do you wanna take it slow?”

“I think it would be better to just go as much as we can. We can go visit Joon,” Jeongguk responded as he twisted his fingers together in his lap. He was sitting with his legs crossed underneath one another, and Taehyung couldn’t help but think how innocent he looked (and how cute he looked.)

“Who?”

“Namjoon. He lives down in Gwangju; runs an inn there. He’ll let us stay the night.”

“Wait, is this the guy who supposedly makes really good coffee?”

“Yeah! There’s a shop in his inn. It’s like a bed and breakfast kinda.”

“Ah.” Taehyung went back to rifling through the bag, pulling out a small container of nuts and dried fruit and another with the rest of the dried meat. He planned on replenishing his supplies once they made it to Gwangju. “Well, eat up so we can go. We’ll have to book it from here.”

“Yeah, of course.”

“And we gotta conserve the water. I kinda fucked up on how much to bring. We’ll be okay I think though. It’s colder, so.” Jeongguk watched closely as Taehyung shoved everything away and stood up to swing his bags back over his shoulders.

“Right.” He did the same.

“You ready to go?” Taehyung waited for Jeongguk's approval before sharply nodding his head and continuing their walk.

\---

The pair were completely quiet the next couple of hours. It wasn’t because either one was upset with the other, it was mostly just because neither knew quite what to say. Things were still kind of awkward between the two from the morning and Taehyung didn’t know what to say or do. Sometimes he could feel Jeongguk's eyes on him, and Taehyung had become accustomed to Jeongguk's staring so he didn’t say much. He figured if he was going to stop being a dick to this kid then the first step would be actually talking to him.

“So, kid… what’s Daejeon like?”

“Huh?” Jeongguk looked up from his feet in surprise that Taehyung had initiated a conversation. “Oh. Uhm, it’s alright, I guess. Really, it’s a nice city. It’s smaller, all fitted inside a baseball stadium that used to belong to the Hanhwa Eagles. I found some old black and white photographs of them playing in a storage closet. I wish I could have been around to see a baseball game.”

“That would have been cool,” agreed Taehyung with a nod of his head. “I’ve read up on some baseball teams but I don’t know exactly how it works.”

“We still have the scores too. Daejeon wasn’t hit too bad, most of the stadium is still intact, but that day the Eagles were playing a team called the Bears. I think they’re from Seoul.” Jeongguk chuckled quietly. “I would love to go to Seoul.”

“That’s a long walk.”

He laughed again. “Yeah, I know. Maybe if we end up finding that plane we can go to Seoul.”

That got Taehyung to crack a smile. “If we get access to a plane, we’re going to see the ocean.”

“You mean… I can go with you?”

“I don’t see why not.”

Jeongguk looked back down at his feet, his face burning with pink. Taehyung’s smile widened. After a few seconds, he responded, “It’s nice to fantasize.”

Taehyung ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. “Yeah.” A pause. “So who was winning the game?”

“Oh, like from the scoreboard?”

“Yeah.”

“The Bears. The Eagles weren’t doing too hot.” Jeongguk laughed loudly, and Taehyung couldn’t deny the warm feeling in his stomach. Jeongguk's laugh was loud and obnoxious and made him smile. He thought about what it would be like to hear that laugh every day.

“Hmm. You could just change the score and say they were.”

“True, but that room is usually locked up. It’s like a piece of history forever frozen in time. I think it’s pretty cool. Nobody is really allowed in there, but I was allowed to see it because I’m part of that caravan.”

“Oh, that’s right. How’s that?”

“Stressful sometimes. We have to look out for raiders and stuff, but I enjoy traveling and meeting new people. It’s cool seeing all the stuff we can barter as well.” He sighed. “Too bad it all got stolen from us.”

“Yeah, that must have uh, sucked.”

“Well, it wasn’t great watching my friends get killed right in front of me.” Jeongguk's jaw was clenched, his entire body rigid. He didn’t seem like the same person he usually was; that small, timid boy. No, he seemed like he had seen some shit.

Like Taehyung.

“I know the feeling.” Taehyung looked away from Jeongguk, nervous he might spark some bad memories. He decided to change the subject. “So you said Daejeon was in the baseball stadium?”

“Yeah! I guess they decided it would be the easiest that way. The area around the stadium is also considered part of the city. They’ve got defense and stuff and security that sits outside. Inside is really cool I think. They’ve got catwalks from the stands and buildings and lights and all kinds of stuff. I don’t know, it’s just really bright and happy. I’ve lived there all my life.”

Taehyung grinned. “I can’t wait to see it.”

He could have sworn Jeongguk's face dropped for a split second before it was back in its grin. “I can show you around. The first place you’ll see is the library, of course. It’s in one of the dugouts.”

“That is sick.”

Jeongguk was blushing again, and Taehyung forgot all about his change in expression. “I’ve never heard you talk this much.”

Taehyung shrugged. “You like Gwangju?”

“Totally. I guess that place is practically my second home. I have a lot of friends there.”

“Yet you can’t remember how to get there on your own?” It was meant as a playful taunt, but Jeongguk frowned again, turning his body away in guilt.

“I just, I’m not good at directions.”

“It’s okay, I was just joking. I don’t mind taking you.”

“You did at first,” he mumbled, and Taehyung’s stomach churned.

“I have a hard time moving on, you know? And I’ve--”

“You’ve been alone for awhile. Yeah, you mentioned that.”

Taehyung clenched his fists by his side, not appreciating Jeongguk's snippy attitude. He didn’t say anything though. Taehyung decided he was going to be quiet again.

This is why he didn’t talk to people.

\---

That night they stopped in Sanchong, and Taehyung led Jeongguk to an old department store called Lot E. Taehyung always had assumed it was called something else at one point in time because there were missing spaces where extra letters could go, but he never questioned it.

Jin had usually taken Taehyung to a house in one of the neighborhoods, but they had walked an extra few miles and Taehyung decided this was good enough. The doors had been bashed in long ago, the front end of the store completely covered in trash and debris. Taehyung let out a low whistle between his teeth, his shotgun cocked and Jeongguk positioned himself behind him. It wasn’t pitch black in the store, but it was still dark to the point where shadows danced in the corners. When there was no answer, he made his way farther into the store down where there was a mixture of carpet and pieces of wood.

“Sorry, this isn’t quite ideal but I figured you might want to stop. Haven’t said anything about your leg.”

“My leg is fine,” Jeongguk promised as he bent down to clear a spot on the carpet. His bags hit the floor and he dusted off his hands before pointing to a shelf with a few old shirts resting on it untouched. Taehyung assumed not many people stopped to loot a department store in a small town. “Help me move that?”

“Sure,” Taehyung responded as he shoved his weight on the right side to help slide it across the carpet. When they finished, Taehyung dropped down to pull out the blankets he had brought just for something like this. Jeongguk sat cross legged on the floor, watching Taehyung carefully.

“There sure is a lot of red in this store.”

“Must have been their theme,” Taehyung grunted as he smoothed out the last blanket and pulled one the bags forward to use it as a makeshift pillow. Jeongguk copied his movements.

“It’s kind of depressing thinking about life before the war. I mean, this store right here. People shopped here. It was a normal thing. And now everything is destroyed.”

“Blame the human race.”

“I wish we never discovered nuclear warfare.”

“Then what would have happened in World War II?”

“Touché.” With an audible sigh, Jeongguk rolled over onto his side facing away from Taehyung. “You’re the most interesting person I’ve ever met, you know that? I’m so intrigued by you.”

Taehyung scoffed loudly. “Thanks, I guess.”

“You’re this tough guy who can kill anyone and anything with one shot, but when you talk about books and history your eyes light up and you smile bigger than any person I’ve ever seen. I don’t know, I just like it a lot. I like you. As a person I mean. Even at first, when I knew you didn’t want me in your house. I know you put on that bad guy act, but just because you’re a bad guy doesn’t mean you’re a bad guy.”

“I’ve killed a lot of people. I’ve stolen a lot of things. I’ve done a lot of bad things. I think that makes me a bad guy.”

“You’re just surviving. And if it hadn’t been for you, I would have died.” Jeongguk rolled back over so he could face Taehyung this time. Taehyung rolled over too, carefully tracing the outline of Jeongguk's jaw with his eyes in the darkness. “You’re incredible.”

“Thank you,” his voice was barely over a whisper. Jeongguk smiled.

They stared at each other for at least ten minutes before Jeongguk reached for Taehyung’s hand, and Taehyung didn’t bother to pull away. Instead, he squeezed to let Jeongguk know it was okay for him to do that.

And the funny thing was, that’s how they fell asleep.

That night Taehyung dreamed he was watching fireworks on New Year’s Eve, Jeongguk right next to him.


End file.
